


Beautiful Liar

by Lacrimula_Falsa



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Fantasy, Friendship, On Hiatus, Story Status Unknown, Tony Stark Has A Heart
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-03
Updated: 2016-12-31
Packaged: 2018-04-18 18:50:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 22,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4716689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lacrimula_Falsa/pseuds/Lacrimula_Falsa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So far Tony has managed to successfully dodge the accidental-pregnancy bullet. It's one of the few things he likes about himself. So he's understandably pissed (not to mentioned totally gobsmacked) when /Loki/ of all people comes suing him for child support. Because honestly, how does that stuff even /work/? (AU, multi-chapter.) ON HIATUS, please see chapter 13 for more information.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. No Evil Demigods Policy

**Author's Note:**

> _**Disclaimer:**_ I do not own any part of the Marvel Cinematic Universe and/or any other Marvel franchise. I write for fun, not for profit. The title of this story was taken from the song of the same name by Beyoncé, which I of course don't own either.
> 
> If you want a long, laborious and emotional Loki-redemption, a meaningful and layered backstory or a Saga-worthy plot, this isn't the story for you. If you're happy with a not-really-evil, not-that-insane pregnant (female) Loki and Tony being Tony but noble at heart, plus Avengers domesticity, jump right in and hopefully enjoy.
> 
> Also, this completely ignores _Thor: The Dark World_ , _Captain America: The Winter Soldier_ and _Avengers: Age of Ultron_.

The day had begun as just another normal day at what was now Avengers Tower.

Clint Barton, better known as Hawkeye, was perched perilously on the backrest of a kitchen chair, managing to eat his breakfast in this position without visible discomfort.  
Tony "I am Iron Man." Stark was currently talking science with Bruce Banner, also known as the other half of the Hulk.  
Captain America, and therefore Steve Rogers, had exchanged his shield for a frying pan and was presently making pancakes.  
Natasha Romanoff, codename Black Widow, was using a knife in a decidedly non-lethal way, cutting apples.

The scene was peaceful and frighteningly domestic.

That is, until a loud crashing sound from the direction of the living room made them all look up and jump into more or less defensive positions.

"Jarvis?" Tony whispered.

"I am detecting no intruders, Sir." The AI's cultured voice answered in equally hushed tones.

Meanwhile Natasha had inched her way towards the door.

But before she could do anything, like _silently_ checking out the situation in the adjacent room, Tony got up from his crouch behind the counter to announce:

"Oh fuck this! I'm not hiding in my own goddamn tower!"

Before anyone could stop him, he was up and trough the door.

* * *

Stepping into the living room, Tony thankfully _did not_ come face-to-face with a gun or an army of intruders.

There was only a single man standing by the floor-to-ceiling windows and didn't he know that…

"LOKI?!"

And, okay, now he had the demigod's full attention and was completely defenceless since he was wearing only Hulk pyjamas and, more importantly, _no suit bracelets_. _Well_ _shit. Bad idea. Very, very bad idea. Shit, shit, shit._

His team-mates would kill him. If Loki didn't kill him first.

Seeing as the last time they had met he'd ended up flying trough a window, Tony really expected just about anything to…

"Ah, the mortal of the hour."

Okay, maybe not _that_.

That was the moment the rest of the Avenger decided to burst into the room, having procured their weapons of choice from somewhere.  
Normally, Hawkeye brandishing his bow while wearing nothing but sleep pants and bunny slippers would have been hilarious. As it was, it was the most wonderful sight Tony had seen in a long time.

Steve was the first to break the silence.

"Loki?"

"You remember me. How delightful."

Suddenly there was a snap and a flash of green light, and a steamer trunk materialised, out of nowhere, near Loki's feet.

"If one of you would be so kind as to show me to my appointed chambers so I might stow away my things."

For just a moment it looked like Steve's jaw was about to hit the floor, before he composed himself and said in full 'Captain America voice':

"We won't fall for your games this time. Drop all your weapons and surrender."

Loki sniffed rather haughtily.

"I will let you know that I do not take orders from mortals."

Just as Steve was stepping towards Loki, there was a "whoosh" and something, or rather someone, landed on the balcony surrounding the whole floor.

"Brother, 'tis not humorous. When will you stop wreaking havoc?" Thor's booming voice filled the room as the God of Thunder stepped inside.

"Thor!"

"Steven! It is most joyous to see you again."

"Okay Point Break, care to explain why your psychotic little brother is standing inside my living room? Because we have a very strict No Evil Demigods policy in this tower."

Thor frowned at 'Demigods' but seemed to let it slide.

"Psychotic, Anthony? I hardly think that is something you should be calling the mother of your child."

Tony stared at Loki, completely flummoxed, before he got out an incredibly eloquent

"What?"

Thor stepped halfway in front of his brother, looking oddly…nervous. He was actually wringing his hands. (Or rather - using Mjölnir as an anti-stress ball.)

"I assure you, An…Tony, my brother has no ill intentions. However, I would speak with the all of you in private."

Loki abruptly turned towards Thor with a thunderous expression.

"Really Thor? You did not explain it to them!? Not a _single thing_? You simply let me teleport here, were I might well be killed for showing my face?! What, were you off frolicking about with your Lady Jane that you were to busy to do, for _once_ in your life, what I asked of you!?"

Thor actually cringed, looking for all the world like a child being scolded for forgetting to brush his teeth.

Tony was not the only one who was staring incredulously. Steve, Clint and Bruce were also sporting a serious case of the What-The-Fucks. Natasha, naturally, looked cool as a cucumber.

"Forgive me brother. I was so unsure about how to best approach the topic that I might have unduly delayed…"

" _Unduly delayed_!? Thor, you buffoon, you did not _delay_ it, you simply didn't do anything! Relaying a simple message really should not exceed even your limited capabilities!"

Loki seemed to be in full hissy-cat mode now, advancing on his apologetic brother with green sparks crackling around his fingertips.

"O-okay, whoa, whoa!" Tony had finally located his heretofore missing voice, plus his suit bracelets. "What the _hell_ is going on here? Thor, why is there a villain with _functioning magic powers_ in my tower!? I mean seriously, what the fuck?"

"I assure you shieldbrother Tony, I will explain in due time."

Beside the God of Thunder Loki threw up his hands, the green sparks fading to blue before going out.

"No Thor, _you_ will not be explaining anything, or we will be here until the end of days. Now, mortal, it's very simple…"

Suddenly the god…shifted, transforming into something that was…well, undeniably a female version of Loki.  
A _really very obviously_ _pregnant_ female version of Loki.

Steve's shield hit the floor with a clatter.

"…you, Anthony Stark of Midgard, are going to be a father." Here Loki pointed towards the suit bracelets Tony had been one step away from activating, then towards his…her rounded stomach. "So you might want to keep your weapons away from the mother of your child."

Tony hadn't had any breakfast yet. That was totally the only reason he fainted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like it, hate it, something you absolutely want to happen? Tell me, reviews make my day. Thank you for reading.


	2. A Noble Guardian Of Midgard

Tony woke up to being simultaneously slapped, shaken _and_ hit with green sparks that stung like hell.

"Ow."

Steve stopped shaking him, Natasha quit the slapping and the angry woman in the green dress stopped with the sparks. Tony sat up.  
Then he remembered that Miss Sparks was _Loki_. Pregnant Loki.

He briefly contemplated fainting again, just before he heard someone laughing.

Bruce was having a laughing fit, leaning into Thor's shoulder for support.  
Tony felt deeply betrayed by his one and only science bro.  
…But on the other hand it was probably fair after all the times he hadn't managed to _not_ laugh about Bruce's Hulk-smashed pants. (In all fairness though, he _was_ still working on the super-stretch ones.)

His genius level intellect wasn't being helpful with finding appropriate words to express the soul-crushing pain of Bruce's betrayal, so Tony blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

"I want it on the record that I did not sleep with Loki."

Bruce laughed harder. Natasha looked like she was trying _really_ hard not to smile. Clint sauntered over and clapped Tony on the shoulder in mock-sympathy.

"Shapeshifters man. Happens to the best of us."

The damn thing was…he might actually be right.

"Fuck you so very much Barton."

"I would say I love you too honeycakes, but Mama Loki might deep-fry me."

"Well not if I…wait, you're surprisingly okay with this. Did you hit Loki while I was out?"

Clint shook his head. "I don't hit pregnant ladies. But I will totally kick him in the nuts once he's a guy again."

"We will see about that mortal." Loki raised his… _her_ hand and then looked around to ascertain that everyone was listening. "And you might have it 'on the record' that I did not lay with Anthony. This" She pointed to her belly. "is not a child conceived by natural means."

Now everyone was staring at Loki again. Bruce had even managed to stop laughing, and was now frowning at Loki.

"Now Loki I don't want to be rude…but that is totally not okay, getting pregnant without the father's consent."

Loki glared at Bruce.

"Do you think I _planned_ to carry my enemies spawn, mortal?"

"Well sorry Mean Green, but your take-over-Earth plan didn't exactly make you look smart."

And wow, now _Tony_ was getting the evil eye.

_Yep, Stark, there you go, piss of the pregnant immortal lady with the freaky magic powers. Smooth guy, really smooth._

Then Loki relaxed somewhat, looking resigned.

"Be that as it may, I am rather out of options now and Midgard is the least of all possible evils."

Thor stepped up again, looking caught between guilty, resigned and angry.

"My father has banned Loki from Asgard, and no other realm will grant him shelter."

"And Earth totally will? Sorry Point Break, but how do you see that working?"

"It is your duty as the father of Loki's child to care not only for that child but also for the mother, and you are a noble guardian of Midgard. I had no doubt that you would choose to aid those in need over any plans for petty revenge."

And now Tony was being pinned by both Thor's I'm-a-god-don't-fuck-with-me stare, Loki's smug-snake look _and_ Steve's oh-great-you-fucked-up-again frown. Bruce started laughing again.

_Fucking fantastic._

"Err yes well…you know, Thor, I'm a responsible guy and all…and of course I…um…totally would 'grant shelter' to your brother…wait, is that currently sister?...but anyway, I don't think that Earth authorities would be okay with that, with him…err…her having tried to invade Earth and all."

Bruce laughed harder.

Thor hefted Mjölnir, looking ready to smite the hell out of a certain genius inventor, when Steve -lovely, perfect Steve- stepped forward to save Tony's sorry behind.

"You know Thor, Tony's right. There is no way that S.H.I.E.L.D., or anyone else for that matter, will just let Loki roam around free. Even if Asgard seems to have pardoned him, that's not how it works on Earth."

Thor deflated visibly, putting down his hammer and dragging a hand trough his godly hair.

"I am aware that the leaders of Midgard think of my brother as a criminal, but I assure you that he was faultless in the invasion of your realm. A being named Thanos found and abused him in a moment of weakness. He is a victim, not the perpetrator."

Everyone stared at Thor, except for Natasha, who was still eyeing Loki.

Then Clint dropped almost everyone's jaws by announcing like it was no big deal

"Yep, Loki was totally mind-whammied too."

Now everyone was staring at Clint.

"Okay Katniss, and the reason you did not mention this before _is_?"

"Well, I was pretty pissed at him at that time, plus still recovering from having _my_ mind whammied. Also, how could Thor _not_ tell, I mean seriously, he's his brother."

"Yes Thor, I would also like to know that." Loki was looking at Thor like the blonde god was a particularly fat and ugly fly in her soup. "Now that he mentions it, it is also of great interest to me how my eyes suddenly changing colour completely escaped your notice, oh greatest of all warriors."

Thor looked like he wished the floor would swallow him, which was not a good look on him at all. Tony decided that he didn't deserve _that_.

"Well, in all fairness you _are_ a shapeshifter."

Loki levelled a look at Tony that promised either violent retribution or eternal torment -or both-, her left hand bursting into green flames. Tony hid behind Steve, who just rolled his eyes.

"Allright, so Loki has been pardoned for the invasion and now you want her to live here since she is both pregnant with Tony's child _and_ banned from her home, does that about cover it?"

And wow, the ancient super-soldier who blushed when someone made allusions to his penis size was the one to treat the insane demands of a pregnant part-time-man like they were the most normal thing in the world. Tony was impressed.

Thor nodded gravely. "It does."

Steve sighed. "Allright, so why don't I show Loki to an available bedroom first and then we reconvene to hash out the particulars of _how exactly_ her child came to be?"

Tony gaped at Steve.

"Wait, what!? Steve, how are we okay with this? Hell we aren't okay with this, _I_ am not okay with this! I mean it's _Loki_ , how do we even know if she's _actually_ pregnant, never mind with Tony Junior?"

"You would doubt my brother's word?"

Thor was back in full mighty-smiting mode. Tony decided he needed to stop pissing off gods with giant hammers. Thankfully Bruce stepped in before Tony could be pancaked by Mjölnir.

"Well no offence Thor, but Loki _was_ our enemy. Even if he…she isn't now, we still have to ascertain that he…she is telling the truth, and that Tony is actually the father. Because even if we take…magic into account, it _does_ sound a lot like virginal conception, which we don't exactly deal with on a regular basis. Not to mention that some tests would also help to make sure that the pregnancy is safe for mother and child."

The last part seemed to pull Thor's attention away from his plan of smashing Tony into pulp.

"I will be present for all of those tests, should my brother agree to them."

"I do Thor, now put away the hammer before you hurt someone. And should you harm the father of my child I will feed you to your nephew."

Thor blinked at Loki in surprise, but to Tony's great relief put down Mjölnir.

"Well thanks for the save Mean Green."

And _whoa_ , now Tony had a handful of green fire far too close to his face.

"That _he_ is not allowed to harm you does not mean that _I_ will not curse you to Helheim. My name is Loki and you will use it."

The inventor gulped. "No pet names, got it."

Loki all but snatched her hand back, flames vanishing.

"Excellent. Now I believe the good captain mentioned something about a room?"

"This way."

"Oh yes, just give people free room and board in _my_ tower, no big deal!"

Everyone ignored Tony.

_Noble guardian of Midgard my ass. More like the idiot bill-payer._

* * *

As soon as Steve and Loki were safely inside the lift, Thor picked up Tony and did his best to squish the life out of him.

"Welcome to the family, shieldbrother Tony. This is a most joyous day. As soon as the captain and my brother have returned, we shall _celebrate_."

"Ugh. That's nice. Uh, big guy, crushed ribs. Need air."

Thor abruptly released the billionaire, taking a step back.

"Ah, I apologise. Sometimes I do not know my own strength."

"No problem Big And Thunderous. Little warning next time?"

"I hate to rain on your parade, Thor, but before any celebrating can happen we need to figure out how exactly Loki got pregnant in the first place. Even if _we_ believe her, S.H.I.E.L.D. will demand answers _and_ proof that the child is Tony's."

"Of course Lady Natasha, you are wise as ever. We shall wait for my brother's return."

That was how the Avengers, sans Captain America, came to be sitting in their shared kitchen at nine in the morning, in their pyjamas, waiting for a pregnant god.


	3. A Child Of Blood And Magic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Warning!:** Mention of and discussion about **abortion**. Read at your own discretion.
> 
> A/N: _Small warning for comic pseudo-science._ Also, this is the point where I start mixing in stuff from the comics and various mythologies.

… _That was how the Avengers, sans Captain America, came to be sitting in their shared kitchen at nine in the morning, in their pyjamas, waiting for a pregnant god. …_

About twenty minutes later Loki entered the kitchen, apparently having exchanged Steve for a new dress. Tony hated to admit it, but Asgardian maternity wear was _stylish_. And also…

"Did you, err, like…grow your hair?"

Loki's smile was positively _radiant_ , like she had just been waiting for someone to notice.

"Why yes."

"With shapeshifting?"

"With a potion."

"Urgh, I don't get magic."

"Sorry to interrupt your moping Tony…"

"Hey! I'm not _moping_."

"…but where's Steve?"

Loki was looking like the cat that got the cream _and_ the canary, smiling winningly at Bruce.

"Why, the good captain has ever so gracefully offered to see to my possessions being moved to my new quarters."

Thor frowned, giving Loki a reproachful look.

"Brother, this is not the time for your games. Release the spell."

Bruce looked up in alarm. "Spell?"

Thor sighed.

"Loki has long made a habit of putting a spell over his travel chest that prevents anyone but him from moving it. Until he ends the spell the chest will not be moved from its spot, no matter how much force is applied to it."

Loki sighed, far more dramatically than Thor, before clapping her hands twice.

"You always spoil all the fun Thor. There, are you happy now?"

"Thank you."

The trickster rolled her eyes. "Do not mention it. Now…"

She clapped her hands again, and suddenly Steve was sitting on the kitchen floor, looking befuddled.

"…may we get this over with?"

"Why don't we move this to the living room?"

* * *

After everyone was settled as comfortably as the situation allowed, Steve -to the surprise of everyone- was the first to break the awkward silence.

"So, I know I'm not all that up to date where modern ways of procreation are concerned, but in my days virginal conception didn't _actually_ work, so, um, how _did_ you get pregnant?"

Loki sighed. "Magic."

Tony groaned and hid his face behind Steve's shield. "I hate this already."

Natasha slapped the back of his head. "Tony shut up, you can pout about this later. Now Loki, we're going to need more of an explanation than _that_."

Loki sighed again, looking very put-upon.

"If you insist. Now, I believe you may have heard of Victor von Doom."

Everyone except Thor tensed up, instinctively reaching for their weapons.

"I'll take that as a yes. Now, since my banishment from Asgard, I have spent some time in your human realm, and inevitably made some new acquaintances. Victor von Doom being one of them."

"Okay, and what does Doctor Doom And Gloom have to do with all of this?"

"Patience Anthony, I was getting there."

Tony mumbled something uncomplimentary under his breath, but ultimately went back to quietly hiding behind Steve's shield.

"Now, as I was saying, I got to know Victor, or 'Doctor Doom' as you call him. As you might be able to imagine, I was not pleased with my…Odin's decision to banish me. As an act of retribution, I planned to steal a magical artefact of great value from the Asgardian treasure vault, called the Stone of Ghorra. In exchange for a favour, Victor agreed to aid me in this endeavour."

"How nice for you. Now where exactly does the pregnancy magic come into play?"

Loki glared at Tony.

"If you interrupt me again, there will be quite another kind of magic 'coming into play'."

Tony made a zipping motion over his lips. "Quiet as a mouse."

"Good. So _as I was saying,_ Victor agreed to aid me in stealing the artefact. To facilitate this plan, it was imperative that we find a way to enter the Realm Eternal undetected. Since Odin had banned me from Asgard, using either the Bifröst or my own magic was not feasible. After some failed attempts at using Victor's magic to create a secret passage, we ultimately decided to create a portal to Asgard by technological…"

"Our TARDIS!"

Everyone stared at Tony.

"The dimension splitter! You stole it! You and Doctor Doombot!"

Steve frowned. "Dimension splitter?"

Tony nodded. "Yep, the one Brucie and I built in my lab."

Bruce held up a hand. "Maybe we should explain what a dimension splitter is first?"

"Oh yeah right. So…Bruce and I tried to replicate the powers of the Asgardian rainbow bridge thingy. Which is why we built what we called a dimension splitter, which I call our TARDIS because it sounds cooler."

"Yes, and this machine was stolen three weeks ago."

Steve's frown deepened.

"And you didn't tell us about the theft?"

Bruce shrugged. "Well, it was non-functional. Technically it was a sound concept, but the machine would have required an element that doesn't actually exist in order to work, which obviously made it useless. When it was stolen, the machine was actually on it's way to the Stark Industries recycling facility, together with some other failed prototypes from the lab."

"That happens all the time." Tony cut in. "Every week or so people try to steal my lab waste. Sometimes someone succeeds, but it's all mostly useless junk anyway, so no big deal. I thought."

Loki cleared her throat, looking annoyed by having her narration interrupted.

"Yes, we stole your 'dimension splitter'. We planned to use a combination of magical substances to substitute the non-existent element."

"Let me guess, it didn't work."

Loki turned towards Tony, looking like the textbook definition of 'wrathful goddess'. The inventor instinctively raised the shield he was still holding.

"It would have worked perfectly fine, had _you_ not bled all over your invention!"

"Whoa, whoa, okay stop." Steve held up his hands in a 'calm down' gesture. "I am not getting it, and I'm sure the other's aren't either. So, Loki, you and von Doom stole this…machine that Tony and Bruce built to open a portal to Asgard. Now what does that have to do with you getting pregnant, and how is it Tony's fault?"

The trickster turned her attention from Tony to Steve.

"That is what I was about to explain when I was interrupted. Again."

"All right, we're sorry, explain away."

Tony was just about to say that _he_ wasn't sorry, when Steve's quelling look made him think better of it. Loki sat back down on the sofa.

"In order for this _dimension splitter_ to operate, an element was required that, as Anthony correctly noted, does not presently exist. In order to create a substitute for this element, Victor and I planned to merge three magical substances. We used a very old type of magic for this. The oldest, in fact. Chaos magic."

"Loki!"

"Thor please be quiet. The last time you endeavoured to lecture me about things you can neither relate to nor understand was tedious and deeply embarrassing for the both of us, let us not repeat it.  
Now, chaos magic is very strong, but it is also a fickle thing. One must keep all elements required for the spell in perfect balance to achieve the intended result, or the outcome might be anything."

Tony still didn't get what that had to do with Loki's pregnancy and was about to say so, but apparently Thor got it because his face lit up in comprehension, before changing to a concerned frown.

"Your spell was disequilibrated."

Loki looked at her brother, apparently surprised by his unexpectedly fine grasp of magical concepts, while Tony was still busy admiring Thor's fancy words.

"Well yes. Apparently your supposed genius" She shot Tony an annoyed look. "injured himself while assembling his ' _TARDIS_ ', which led to a small amount of his blood being contained inside the machine. Blood, even that of a mortal, being a powerful magical substance, this small amount was unfortunately enough to disrupt the balance of our spell."

"So you're saying my blood made your spell not work?"

He was probably risking his physical integrity by interrupting again, but then Tony had Steve's shield to deflect spells so maybe he would get to keep his life. Positive thinking.

Loki sighed again.

"It did not negate the spell so much as change it. Due to the disruption caused by your blood, the spell -instead of fusing the three components as intended- merged my magic, the energy used to power the machine and your blood. With obvious consequences." She gestured to her stomach.

"Does that mean that this child you're carrying is actually made up of blood and magic?"

Loki turned to face Natasha.

"It does simplify the matter greatly, but in essence, yes."

"Wait, doesn't this also mean that you got knocked up as a guy?"

The trickster rolled her eyes at Clint. "No, I was in female form at that time."

"Well I guess whatever floats your boat buddy."

"As a way of staying _incognito_ , Barton. Unlike my usual appearance, humans do not usually associate my female form with impending large-scale destruction."

"Or brainwashing."

"For what it is worth, I _am_ sorry about that. Having been on the receiving end of it myself, I know that it is a very unpleasant experience."

"Unpleasant my ass, more like sanity breaking."

"Well sorry to interrupt your little therapy session, but _hello-o_ , _my_ sanity is being broken here. I mean I'm going to be a father because I scratched myself on a screwdriver, what the fuck!? I hate magic."

"Yes, you have made that _abundantly_ clear."

And now Loki actually sounded kind of hurt and Tony felt like an ass for basically implying he hated their child by default and _whoa_ , where the hell had that thought come from!? It wasn't _their_ child, he still had to see proof that it was even _his_ , not to mention that even then it couldn't really ever be _theirs_ because the mother was _Loki_.

Bruce voice snapped Tony out of his little introspection.

"Look, please don't kill me for bringing this up, but seeing as you were clearly not looking to get pregnant with Tony's child…Loki wasn't there a way to, um, remove it?"

The sorceress blinked at Bruce.

"A way to remove what, exactly?"

"I meant ending the pregnancy. Abortion. Well, obviously you're too far along _now_ , but didn't you consider it, at the beginning?"

"Um, Bruciebear, the way Thor is clutching his hammer I don't think that this is a god-approved subject."

" _Thor_ would do well to keep out of this." Loki's voice was as friendly as a dragon's spiky tail in front of someone's face. "And I will let you know, mortal, that I never _consider_ killing children."

"Well, that's a no then so that is that. Thank you for not hexing me."

Apparently being the other half of the Hulk was _really_ good for keeping calm, because Bruce hadn't even flinched in the face of being seized up by two angry deities.

That was when the lift dinged, admitting Pepper into the room.

Everyone kind of tensed up, bracing themselves for a supremely awkward explanation about why there was a stranger in the tower, when Pepper went over to them and very casually dumped a stack of files on Tony's lap.

"These are for you. Hello Loki."

"Miss Potts."

Everyone (except Loki) turned to stare at Pepper in various degrees of surprised disbelief.

"Pepper, how do you know that that is Loki."

"Well Tony she hardly looks _that_ different. And as you might know, _if you actually paid attention to these things_ , everyone who sues you for child support has to go through me, which was your idea so don't complain about it."

"Wait, what?"

"She filed all the paperwork and we did a paternity test." Pepper beamed at the billionaire. "Congratulations Tony. You're going to be a dad."

"Wait, what?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am not all that happy with how parts of this chapter turned out, but failed at doing better, so I hope you enjoyed it anyway.


	4. Honesty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  _ **Disclaimer:**_ I do not own _Candid Camera_.
> 
> _A/N:_ This is where the touchy-feely starts happening. You've been warned.

… _"She filed all the paperwork and we did a paternity test." Pepper beamed at the billionaire. "Congratulations Tony. You're going to be a dad."_

_"Wait, what?"…_

_-_

"Wait, what?"

Pepper, long used to Tony's antics, simply pulled a sheet of paper out of the stack she'd just dumped on him.

"Here. Read."

Tony's face disappeared behind the paper. After a moment he handed it to Bruce, white as chalk and with hands that shook slightly.

"It's mine."

Bruce skimmed the page, eyebrows raising until they threatened to jump of his forehead.

"It's his."

"Well congratulations…Tony?"

The inventor still seemed to be somewhat in shock, but he did turn his head towards Steve at being spoken to.

"Hm?"

"Tony, are you alright?"

Tony all but shot up out of his seat, before moving backwards towards the lift, making strange hand motions and babbling all the while.

"Yep, fine, totally fine. Golden. You know what, I'll just…go…do things. You know. Science stuff. And stuff. Lots of…important things…to do and all. So, I'll, I'll…I'll…just go."

The lift doors closed on the last word.  
Everyone sat there in somewhat stunned silence for about a minute, before Steve and Bruce moved to get up at the same time.

Before one of them could actually follow the billionaire, Loki disappeared in a flash.

Bruce and Steve sat back down. Thor put Mjölnir back on the floor.

* * *

"Stark?"

Tony hid behind his workbench and hugged a screwdriver to his chest.

"Anthony I know you are here and I have a significantly longer lifespan than you, so there really is no way for you to 'out-wait' me."

There were footsteps and then the sound of someone sitting down on the old sofa that occupied a corner of the lab. Tony knew that creaking.

"You might want to know that in Asgard, hiding from expectant mothers is considered a reason for capital punishment."

Tony poked his head over the top of the worktable.

"What, really?"

Loki smiled tiredly. "No."

"You just wanted me to stop hiding didn't you?"

"Yes. Now sit down, I don't want to strain my neck."

Tony sat. It was…strangely not-weird, sitting next to Loki. It was probably idiotic and short-sighted of him _and_ would probably bite him in the ass later, but somehow it was really hard to reconcile the pregnant woman next to him with the insane maniac who'd tried to conquer Earth. And failed.

There was a long moment of tense silence before Tony finally gathered enough courage to speak.

"I'm sorry I freaked out on you."

To his surprise Loki started laughing, a bit wetly and slightly hysterical in a way that shouldn't tug at is heartstrings because this was _Loki_ but totally did.

"Oh mortal. Believe me, _that_ was not 'freaking out on me'. If anything yours was the most positive reaction yet."

_The most positive…wait, what?_

"Err, could you, um, elaborate on that?"

The goddess drew a deep breath, seemingly steeling herself.

"Anthony what do you know about Midgardian Norse mythology?"

Tony had done some research after the battle of New York. The parts of it he could recall off the top of his head were enough to make him swallow reflexively, and look down at his hands that were still clutching the screwdriver. He felt like someone was using a juicer on his insides.

"Did all of that really happen to you? Did that…happen to your children?"

_That would explain why you're…you._

"Yes and no. About half of the more commonly known myths are true. Some of them have been greatly altered with frequent retelling. Most of these legends have a core of truth that has been woven into a shell of embellishments and fantasy."

"So what you are saying is…"

"What I am saying is that being a shapeshifter is something most Asgardians consider useful when it aids them, but unnatural and hideous otherwise. But most will overlook it unless they are directly confronted with it."

"Yeah, I guess a man getting pregnant is a pretty drastic way of being 'directly confronted' with it."

"Precisely."

"I really don't want to know what the worst reaction was, but I'm also morbidly curious." _And desperately trying to avoid talking about the actual issue. Repression, your last name is Stark._

"I believe trying to kill me would objectively count as the worst one."

_Oh._ "I'm sorry I asked."

"Are you ready to talk about your 'freaking out' or do you wish to hide some more?"

_Don't be an asshole about this Stark._

"Would it be cliché to say 'It's not you, it's me.'?"

"I would not know what is considered 'cliché' by Midgardian standards."

"You're not going to let me take the easy way out huh?"

"No."

Tony sighed, fiddling with the screwdriver.

"Look it's just…I never _wanted_ to have children. In fact, I've done pretty much everything non-permanent I could do to avoid them. I was…well for a long time I was the kind of dickhead that dumped people after a night without regrets, and I wasn't nice about it. One of the only things I'm proud of -that I didn't build- is not being the kind of asshole that dumped them pregnant, too. And now I just…you just…argh!"

"Now you are going to be the father of a child that you did not sire?"

"I would have phrased that less Shakespeare In The Park, but yes. And also…it's… _you_. I mean, you're not exactly who I'd have dreamed up as the mother of my children."

"Oh, so we are planning to have another one?"

It took a moment for the seeming non-sequitur to penetrate his brain. Then Tony started and shot the trickster a funny look.

"Are you seriously joking about this?"

The corners of Loki's mouth turned down into a rueful expression.

"I have been told with some frequency that my tendency to use sarcasm as a shield is what often gets me into trouble."

"Well I never thought I would say this, but that's something we have in common."

Loki smiled wanly. "I noticed."

There was a long moment of supremely awkward silence, before Tony tentatively inched a hand towards Loki's stomach, preparing to be hexed any second.

"Could I, um…"

"Oh for Valhalla's sake!"

Loki grasped his hand and put it on her belly.

"The child's not moving yet."

"Oh. Shouldn't it be at this point?"

"Considering this hardly qualifies as a normal pregnancy, I would not know."

"Yeah, right."

Tony drew his hand back.

"So. You are being…awfully trusting about, well, this. I mean…you're surrounded by your ex-enemies. No offence, but most people would call that stupid."

"Anthony I know _you_ are quite the opposite of stupid, even by Asgardian standards. I have been banned from my home realm, and am hardly welcome anywhere else. As much as it pains me to say it…Midgard is the only place I have left. And besides, I will always put my child's safety before my own pride. I will let you draw your own conclusions from that."

Tony swallowed again. _My child._ This was real. No waking up in the near future. No one jumping out behind a potted plant saying "Smile, you're on _Candid Camera_."

_Fucking magic._

"Well, I guess this is still about a thousand times shittier for you than it is for me."

"The situation is certainly not…ideal, but I have to say that it could be worse."

He tried to keep his mouth shut, he really did, but in the end Tony couldn't help blurting out

"What!? How could it be _worse_?",

which he regretted instantly when the trickster's expression shuttered, and therefore immediately followed up with

"Shit I'm sorry don't tell me."

There was another long stretch of silence.

"So, what do we do now?"

Tony realised that he sounded like a scared child, but he _was_ scared, damnit! _Fucking terrified.  
_ Loki sighed. That seemed to be becoming a theme. Tony didn't like it.

"I believe now we rejoin your friends before they, or -powers forbid- _Thor_ , decide to rescue you."

"Well, I think Thor is far more likely to try and rescue _you_ than me."

It was strangely gratifying to see Loki smile at that, even somewhat disdainfully.

* * *

When billionaire and goddess reappeared in the living room -courtesy of Loki's magic-, everyone was still sitting where they had left them, only that Clint had acquired a bowl of popcorn from somewhere.

All eyes turned towards Tony, who was sure that he hadn't felt this unmoored since the day his parents died.

Even after the Ten Rings, he'd had a purpose to drive him. Now he felt like _he_ was driving; a racing car trough fog without any idea of where the track was.  
But being in the public eye all the time at least taught you one thing. How to talk in a steady voice even if your world was ending.

"So. Loki is going to stay with us for…the foreseeable future, under the condition that Thor stays with her. She'll get her own room and is free to roam the tower, but she'll only leave it together with one of us. No evil-doing on her part, no avenging towards her on ours. That's pretty much it. Questions?"

Tony realised that he was talking to his friends like they were reporters, but was to busy still having an internal crisis to care right then.

"Has Loki agreed to all of this?"

"Really Thor, would I be standing here saying nothing if I hadn't?"

"Then I have no reason to object to this terms. I will stay here with Loki. However, I _will_ have to leave if the Allfather demands my presence. It is my duty as a prince of Asgard."

"I think we can make exceptions for that, if you don't stay away for too long."

"I will do my best."

Clint actually raised his hand like a child in school. Usually Tony welcomed another snark-master in a tense situation, but right now he really didn't want to deal with that shit, which was really ironic coming from him.

"Clint."

"So, does that mean you're officially Iron Daddy now? How's it feel?"

The billionaire dragged a hand through his hair.

"Clint can you just…can you just not, right now?"

It was a testament to Clint being a real friend, and actually more sensitive than most people gave him credit for, that he _did_ shut up just then.

-

Then Natasha said something about "finally getting that fucking muesli" and disappeared into the kitchen, which was apparently the signal for everyone else to get back to…something, and for Loki to disappear in a flash.

Left alone in the suddenly gigantic living room, Tony just curled up in a ball on the sofa, and hoped that he would feel remotely human when he woke up.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _A/N:_ Confession: I've never watched an episode of "Candid Camera" in my life, and got my information about it from Wikipedia. Yes, I'm _that_ kind of researcher.


	5. Routine (And Fury)

The first meal with Loki at the table was…well, strange was probably not an adequate word to describe it.  
It was more like everyone was not only walking but also sitting on eggshells, with some hot coals thrown into the mix just for fun.

At this point Tony would, he somewhat guiltily admitted to himself, be really grateful if a Doombot decided to burst through the living room windows. Or a slimy-tentacles thing. Or an alien that wasn't a Norse deity. He wasn't picky.

What made the whole affair even stranger was how…civil everyone was being. No one was treating Loki like the would-be conqueror of Earth.

…Which on second thought maybe wasn't so surprising given that Loki was, at the moment, A) female and B) very obviously pregnant, which apparently was grounds enough for civility even for Clint.

Even Thor was chewing his vegetable lasagne in sombre silence, only glancing at Loki and the Avengers every now and then.

"Would you hand me the salt please?"

Tony nearly jumped a mile, and had to tighten his hold on his glass lest he drop it.

"I was listening!"

Loki pinched the bridge of her nose in exasperation.

"The salt, Anthony, on your left. Might you consider handing it over?"

"What? Oh, um, sure, there you go."

"Thank you."

No more words where spoken until the end of lunch, when Loki made everyone (except Thor) jump when she magic-ed everything into the dishwasher.

"Whoa!"

Loki shot Clint a "not that I wasn't expecting it but what is it _now_ " look.

"Should I put it back?"

Thankfully Bruce was there to save the day.

"No it's fine, you just startled us."

That was apparently all the dismissal Loki needed because she left the kitchen without looking back. Walking like a normal person for once.

"Well that went well."

Tony really wanted to say "Shut up Natasha." but didn't dare.

* * *

After a few days everyone had established a routine.

They would go about their days -Avenger business free ones so far, which was a relief- like nothing had changed, only that Loki turned up at mealtimes and left afterwards.

…Not to mention that Tony jumped every time he saw Loki somewhere in the tower, usually equipped with a book. He wasn't sure if the others didn't have that problem, or were just better at hiding it.

He was also still internally freaking out about becoming a father, which was probably the reason why he completely forgot about S.H.I.E.L.D..

* * *

Two weeks after Loki had first turned up at the tower, the Avengers sans Thor (whom Loki had dragged of to gods-knew-where) were facing an irate Fury on the TV, which was currently doubling as a com-screen.

"I have _two_ , as in T-W-O, agents _living_ in that tower! So will someone _please_ tell me how LOKI LIVING THERE, for _two weeks_ , has not come to my attention until I got _a fucking letter from_ _ASGARD_!?"

"Loki is not a threat director, and Asgard has pardoned him for invading Midgard. He is living in the tower because he has been exiled to Earth and Thor requested the Avengers help with protecting Loki from the public, and vice versa. Which makes this an Avengers matter, not a S.H.I.E.L.D. matter."

"And since when do _you_ get to decide these things, _Miss Potts_?"

Pepper looked completely unfazed by Fury's one-eyed wrath.

"Since the Avengers made me their official spokesperson in all matters related to the media or government agencies, director. Now, does S.H.I.E.L.D. actually have any reason _besides_ your personal dislike of the situation to disapprove of Loki being here, under constant watch, permanently accompanied by at least one Avenger?"

Fury visibly grit his teeth, looking like he wanted to kill someone, preferably with his bare hands.

"No. Not that it would matter anyway. Apparently Loki's mother, _the Queen of Asgard_ , would not approve of anyone mistreating her baby boy. The Council has decided that they have seen Thor fight, and therefore have no desire to risk his mama calling the Asgardian army down on us."

"Excellent. Then I believe that this discussion is over."

Pepper made to turn away from the screen, when Fury said

"Potts."

"Yes director?"

"Loki stays. But if that little bugger steps so much as a _toe_ out of line, I will _nuke_ him back to Asgard, prince or not."

"Understood."

With that the screen went black. Everyone relaxed visibly.

It hadn't escaped Tony's notice that no one -apparently including Queen Frigga- had found it necessary to inform the director of S.H.I.E.L.D. that Loki was currently female, and pregnant.

"So Tony, I did my job. Now I have to run so I can get back to my other one. Don't mention it, the black Louboutins would be nice, I e-mailed you."

With that Pepper swaned out of the room. Tony took a moment to thank the universe for making her exist.

* * *

A few hours later, Tony managed to corner Natasha in the gym. If she was surprised to see him there in a suit, it didn't show.

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"Say anything about what?"

"Loki. Living in the tower. I mean, I kind of get it with Clint…no scratch that, I don't get it with Clint either…but you are like, _the_ Agent. I mean you're basically Fury's favourite. So how did you _not_ tell him the moment we turned our backs?"

"Look, I'll tell you the same thing I told Loki. I know S.H.I.E.L.D.. And I also know what it's like to be a government experiment. I'm many things, but I'm not the kind of person to wish that on anyone. And even if I don't believe in getting special treatment because you're a _woman_ , being pregnant is different. Even I know that."

Tony was rather stunned by Natasha willingly talking about her past, so it took a moment for her first statement to get through.

"Wait, Loki talked to you!?"

She gave him a "wow you're slow today" look.

"Yes."

"How did it go?"

"We reached an understanding."

Beat.

"You're going to be late for your fundraiser."

"How do you…"

"That's the fundraiser suit."

"Oh, superspy, right."

Natasha shouldered past Tony, but he caught her sleeve before she could leave.

"Nat?"

"What now?"

"Thank you."

She didn't eve dignify that with a response.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Filler chapter until I figure out what happens next.


	6. Running (And Stopping)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After reading chapter seventeen of _MissMelysse_ 's "Crush II: Ostinato" on FF.net, I longed for some hurt/comfort, sugar-coated. So, more touchy-feely. Yes, I _know_.

Three weeks after Loki had made her grand entrance into the Avengers' life, Tony was awake in the middle of the night, and on his way to the kitchen for a glass of milk. Or maybe Scotch.

He'd woken rather abruptly from a nightmare about a giant green slug breaking out of Loki's belly, while he was being strangled by Thor. That dream-Loki had been male and blue-eyed hadn't exactly made it less disturbing.

Yes, definitely Scotch. Or maybe some of Natasha's throat-scorching Vodka.

He was just stepping out of the lift, still weighting the pros and cons of stealing Natasha's Vodka (pro: getting smashed, con: possible dismemberment), when he saw a figure sitting in front of the floor-to-ceiling windows.

Tony just so managed not to yelp. It took a moment for him to match up _dark-haired pregnant lady_ with _Loki_ , but he thankfully made the connection before he could activate his suit bracelets. (That he'd taken to wearing to bed ever since Loki had first shown up at the tower.) That would have ended badly, he could tell.

"Err, Loki?"

The trickster turned to face him, looking startled.

It was hard to tell at first, with only the light from the city shining in through the window, but Loki had definitely been crying.

...Or, well, at least been shedding tears, because Loki was apparently one of those pretty Hollywood criers that didn't get a runny nose and ugly bloodshot eyes but instead got wet cheeks and dramatically dark lashes.

If someone had told Tony a few weeks earlier that his first reaction upon seeing a _crying, pregnant_ and _female_ Loki sitting in his living room would be to think

"Wow, she's still beautiful.",

well, he would have strongly suggested that they get professional help.

The sorceress gave him a haughty look, roughly wiping her cheeks with the back of her hand.

"What do you want?"

"Well, a glass of Vodka would be great, or alternatively Scotch, but considering that it'd be terribly rude to drink when you shouldn't means I'll probably get tea."

Loki blinked at him.

Sighing, Tony plopped down onto the floor next to the goddess.

"Did you have a nightmare too?"

The inventor abruptly found himself pinned by a frighteningly intense green-eyed gaze.

"You had a nightmare? About what?"

"Um, well, a giant green slug breaking out of your belly. Oh, and you were male…and mind-whammied."

There was a pause.

"Err, and Thor was strangling me so I couldn't get to you."

And odd look crossed Loki's face.

"You tried?"

"Tried what?"

"You tried to get to me, in the dream?"

"Um, yes."

He had no idea why that made her smile, but it wasn't crying so he decided not to question his luck. He couldn't deal with crying people. Especially when they were Loki.

"So, did you?"

She frowned.

"Did I what Anthony?"

"Have a nightmare."

Loki looked at him in a way that he totally couldn't interpret. It could have been a " _well I'm living one_ " look as well as a " _why am I even talking to you_ " look.

After a moment she said. "No. But I think you shouldn't try to drink away yours."

Now it was Tony's turn to frown.

"Well, I'm not going to. As I said, it's rude to drink next to someone who can't. I mean you _could_ drink a Vodka with me, but since you're pregnant that would be shitty right now."

"So you _do_ care. One wouldn't notice from the way you keep running away."

"Running away!? I'm not running away!"

Suddenly Loki leaned forward into his personal space, a sharp line of anger between her brows.

"Oh, aren't you? I have seen more of your archer in the last three weeks than I've seen of _you_ , and _he_ has been on two missions. If you find the sight of me so horrendous then at least own up to it! Even Thor is more subtle than _you_!"

And now Loki was crying again and _"horrendous" wait, what?_ and _whoa_.

"Wait, no. That's not why I've been avoiding you! I don't find you… _horrendous_ , that's bullshit!"

The goddess looked up, looking very un-godly right then.

"You don't?"

"No! You're beautiful. You have, like, a giant ego, so you should know that. It's not your face and it's _certainly_ not the fact that you're pregnant. Who made you believe that shit?"

Loki looked away, apparently trying to hide the tears still running down her face.

"It's the reason why everyone el…It was always the reason before."

_Oh. Well, I really want to sock_ everyone else _in the face right now._

"Well it's not the reason _now_."

She turned to face him again, looking less sad and more angry again.

"Then tell me what the reason is!"

"The reason is that I'm fucking terrified! I'm scared out of my wits and have _no_ idea how to deal with it! Becoming a father would be bad enough without the mother…"

Tony clapped a hand over his mouth. _Shit!_

Loki's face went from angry to devastated but resigned in three seconds.

The inventor cast about for something to say that would save the impending train wreck of a situation, before meekly settling on

"Would you believe that I was going to end that sentence with 'being my former enemy'?"

Loki sighed, turning her face towards the window again.

"What I believe does not matter. It never has and I do not expect it to start mattering now."

"Well it matters to me."

"Why?"

_Ouch._

"Because even tough you might not have noticed, I'm trying to not be an asshole about this! And okay, I've been doing a shit job of it until now, but believe me, for me not making it worse by running my stupid mouth _is_ trying."

Miraculously that was what made Loki stop short. The trickster's expression changed from tired bleakness to something more…open, almost like a mask falling off.

"You really _are_ trying, aren't you."

She sounded so… _fond_. It made Tony wonder if Loki's personality changed with her gender, or if the brainwashing Loki had apparently received pre-invasion had just been that bad. It also made him feel like someone was wringing out his insides like a wet towel.

"I am trying, I really am. It's just…look, I don't _get_ magic. And don't tell the others, but…things I don't understand are my worst nightmare. _You_ are kind of my worst nightmare. I mean, you're a sex-changing alien with _magic_. A riddle wrapped in a conundrum stuck in a box of impossibilities. And that scares me. Badly."

A small niggling voice in the back of his mind reminded the billionaire that he was exposing one of his greatest vulnerabilities (maybe _the_ greatest one) to a possible enemy, but the much louder voice yelling _"Don't fuck up for_ once _in your life Stark!"_ at him was drowning it out.

"So, I'm not running from _you_. I'm running from…"

"…not knowing?"

He nodded.

"Ah. I think I can…relate to that, in a way. I am not fond of not knowing things myself."

"I bet. So…maybe if I promise to stop running away, you'll promise not to hex me if I say something stupid or accidentally insult you? And maybe not to permanently turn me into a toad?"

"No. I do not make promises I cannot keep. I will, however, promise to exert some restrained where hexing you is concerned, and not to take _everything_ you say personally. And I would never permanently turn you into anything, that would be a terrible waste."

Yep, and that was a smile right there. _You go, Stark._

"Deal. I don't have to sign anything in blood, do I?"

Loki made a face.

"What gave you that idea?"

"Err mostly watching too much TV."

"I get a feeling Midgardians get a lot of stupid ideas from this 'TV' thing."

"We so do. I suspect that it gave Clint the idea to hide all my left socks in the Iron Man suit."

"No that was me."

Tony stared. Loki smirked.

"It was your archer's idea though."

" _Our archer_ has a name you know. It's Clint."

"A day spent as a goat has not deterred _him_ from calling me 'Maleficent'."

"Ah. I, um, see."

"Are you laughing at me?"

Tony managed to gasp out "Trying not to." through his laughter. After he'd calmed down he said

"You really turned Clint into a goat?"

"Yes. And the captain into a dove."

"What, what did Steve do!?"

"He was…hovering. And he kept calling me _Ma'am_."

That had the inventor laughing again.

"I'll try not to hover then."

"You'd better not. I am pregnant, not disabled."

There was a pause before Tony remembered why he had entered the living room in the first place. By now he was rather wide awake.

"Oh, I guess I'll get that tea now. Could we, like, move to the sofa though, because this floor is _hard_."

" _I_ am sitting on a pillow."

"Of course you are. Well, I'll be right back."

* * *

When Tony returned from the kitchen with two cups of tea, Loki was fast asleep on the sofa, suffused in a light green glow, almost like she had glow-in-the-dark skin.

Tony was a bit apprehensive about touching her right then, but figured it would be kind of rude to let her get cold. Thankfully draping a blanket over her _didn't_ end with his hands melted of, even though the glow-thing made his skin tingle.

After he'd gotten that out of the way he warred with himself for a moment, before finally sitting down in front of the sofa so he was at eye level with her stomach.

"You know baby, you've got it easy. It's probably nice and cosy in there and you'll just bide your time until the grownups have dealt with their shi…stuff, right? I wonder if you'll be a giant wolf. Or a snake? I think I could deal with a snake, if it didn't have world-spanning proportions. But maybe you'll do daddy a favour and come out human-shaped? Please? Or maybe…humanoid? We can do humanoid, right? But don't worry baby, I'm sure mama will love you anyway. And I'll try okay? Pinkie swear."

It felt kind of weird to be whispering to Loki's stomach in the almost-dark, but it also made him feel better, so he decided not to question it too much.

In the end Tony dozed of with his head on Loki's blanket-clad legs, and this time he dreamed of a snake-skinned little girl with black hair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We advise that you brush your teeth after the consumption of this chapter. Thank you for reading.


	7. Roses And Stuff

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  _ **Disclaimer:**_ I do not own the film _Stardust_.
> 
> Let me just say that this fic is labelled _Friendship_ for a reason. While it might feature on the sidelines (Jane and Thor come to mind) romance of any kind is not the focus of this story. And I of course felt the need to process that topic in fic, so here we go:

"Anthony, have you seen the stone Thor brought me from Alfheim?"

"No."

"Are you certain?"

"Well yes. I think I would remember stumbling over any magic stones."

Loki studied the inventor dubiously, before striding out of the kitchen.

Tony exhaled slowly, and pulled the glowing piece of rock out of the cereal box. That had been close.

* * *

Natasha, Clint and Loki were halfway through watching _Stardust_ when Tony came into the room, grabbed the remote and hit pause.

"Hey!"

"Loki, I have a serious question."

"Ah."

"Yes. Are you, like, coming on to me?"

Clint started laughing and almost asphyxiated on his popcorn. Natasha hit him on the back. Loki blinked at Tony.

"Am I what?"

"Are you, um…making advances? Err…trying to woo me?"

Loki's expression went from "okay what" to "are you _insane_ " in about two seconds.

"Did you hit your head?"

Clint had managed not to suffocate and was now leaning into Natasha's shoulder while laughing his butt off. Natasha was actually grinning, which amounted to much the same thing.

Tony decided that he didn't like people laughing at his plight.

"So, you're…not?"

"No. Unlike Thor I am not stupid enough to enter into a dalliance with someone with a Midgardian lifespan."

"I…oh. Okay. It's just that…you know, you're kind of the only one that I know who could make roses grow on my workshop walls…and ceiling."

There was an ominous pause before Loki said

"Roses."

"Err, yes?"

"So you _did_ steal that stone."

"I didn't _steal_ it. I, um, temporarily displaced it in the interest of science?"

Tony hid behind the sofa.

Surprisingly enough Loki didn't go full vengeful-deity-freak-out on him, but instead just dragged a hand down her face.

"Stark."

Aaand last name. That wasn't good.

"Uh, yes?"

"If you _ever_ steal from me again, I will spell both your hands off."

"Noted."

"And if you want the flowers to go away just take the stone and put it inside of something white."

"What do you mean just take the stone? I can't 'just take the stone', it's buried under a metric fuck-ton of roses!"

Loki pinned Tony with a glare like that of a dragon about to spew fire.

"That - is - _your_ problem."

"Yeah, yeah, okay, but couldn't you, like, give me a hint."

A small ball of green fire missed the billionaire's face by about an inch. Tony shrieked and all but dove behind an armchair for cover, before he hightailed it out of the room.

* * *

"So, you are saying you know why my workshop looks like a florist went mad in there?"

"Aye. The stone you stole from Loki…"

"Borrowed! I only borrowed it."

Thor gave him a _look_.

"O-okay, I might have, um, kind of illegally absconded with it. Anyway, you were saying?"

"That stone is a piece of the Rocks of Growth in Alfheim. The plants are a product of the stone's magic."

"I hate…anyway, what do we do about them? I need my workshop to not look like Alice's Mad Garden. I tried cutting them back, but it's like for everyone I cut off two new ones sprout."

Thor was suddenly giving him a Very Concerned Look.

"What?"

"You cut them?"

"Yeeees…"

"That was a grave mistake."

"What, why!?"

Tony turned towards Thor, hand hovering over the opening mechanism for the workshop door.

Thor sighed.

"It is better if I show you. Open the door please."

Tony did.

He just so heard Thor say "Brace yourself." before he was buried in roses. With thorns.

"Ow, ow, ow! Thor, help! Help!"

He flailed around until his right hand connected with Mjölnir, which he immediately held onto.

After that it was all kind of a blur of thorns and petals, as Thor dragged him out of the Flowers Of Death. It felt more like being dragged through shattered glass. Tony was reasonably sure that his scrapes had scrapes. He decided to just stay on the floor just then.

"Thanks Point Break. Ow."

"I am sorry. I did not realise just how much they might have grown. How many did you cut off?"

"Err…about fifty?"

The inventor took one look at Thor's face and immediately sighed in defeat.

"I'm going to need Loki's help with this right?"

"Yes." Thor's lips were twitching suspiciously, but the thunder god was a good bro, because he didn't _actually_ laugh.

"Oh come on!"

Beat.

"So, how do I get her to help me."

"Usually? Bribe her with something."

"Really, that's it?"

"Well, it should be something she doesn't have already and cannot easily acquire. Finding something like that can be an arduous task."

Tony moaned and hid his face in his hands.

"Grovelling might also help."

"I am so _dead_."

Thor patted his shoulder consolingly. (And also somewhat condescendingly.)

"I am sure you will manage. Your genius is far renowned on Midgard."

Tony looked up from where he was sitting on the floor in despair.

"Are you mocking me?"

"Only a little."

Tony hid behind his hands again.

"If it helps, I will help you talk to Loki?"

The billionaire dragged himself up on the wall.

"Okay, let's get it over with. Maybe my scraped and scratched state will earn me some pity points."

"Loki once refused to put out Fandral's burning arm before he apologised to her."

"Oh."

"Oh indeed."

"Well, I'll just prepare to grovel then."

* * *

Loki really didn't feel inclined to help. Not even after Tony sacrificed his dignity and _literally_ grovelled at her feet.  
Thus barred from his workshop, Tony decided to start building a nursery from scratch.

Pepper _was_ inclined to help. After he bribed her with expensive jewellery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter is short.


	8. Blue Skin And Fallen Soldier

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so there's no confusion, it's been about three days since the last chapter. We had something sweet, now for something bitter.
> 
> _**Disclaimer:**_ I do not own Minecraft.

"Thor, could you, um, maybe take a look at Loki? She's locked herself in the bathroom and refuses to let me in. Jarvis says she's been in there for two hours..."

"Two hours, two minutes." The AI chimed in helpfully.

"Yeah, that. And I'd break down the door, but quite frankly I have no desire to repeat the experience of being a bird."

Thor frowned up at Steve from where he was sitting on the floor polishing his armour.

"Does she seem injured."

"Um, no? But she sounded really…strange. I think maybe she doesn't want to look weak in front of an Avenger? I don't know, I just figured she'd maybe talk to her brother?"

The audible question mark at the end of Steve's sentence implied that he wasn't actually sure, but was concerned enough to ask anyway.

Thor took a moment to appreciate Steve's kindness towards a former enemy, before he set his chestplate aside and stood up.

"I will talk to her. It might be nothing. Loki can be…volatile in her moods."

The captain looked very relieved to hear that, but still insisted on showing Thor to the bathroom.

After the captain had left, Thor knocked on the door.

"Loki?"

No one answered.

"I require advice."

"Go away Thor."

Thor frowned. Loki _did_ sound strange, almost like she had been crying.

"Are you in distress? You sound unwell."

There was a strange banging sound from the other side of the bathroom door, and a noise almost like ice breaking. Thor frowned harder.

"Loki? Do you require assistance?"

"No. Now go away."

Thor felt his frown deepen even further. It was so typical of Loki to refuse aid.

"I will not leave this place until I have made sure that you are well."

There was a pause before the door was violently ripped open.

Thor blinked. Loki was wearing a towel around her head, hiding everything but her eyes.

"I am well. Now _leave_."

"What has happened? Are you injured?"

"Nothing happened. Now give me some space!"

Loki tried to close the door again. Thor caught it.

"Loki what are you…" He trailed off when something strange caught his eye. "Your eyes are red!"

Thor found himself abruptly being pulled inside the bathroom.

Before he had time to say anything, Loki dropped the towel and he was looking at his sister's face.

Her face that was marred by uneven patches of bright blue, with strange raised markings running over her forehead, red eyes defiantly staring back at him. Ice crystals were clinging to her cheeks.

"Are you happy now?"

"No. I still require advice."

Loki looked completely stunned for a moment, which didn't happen often.

"Advice. _You_ are asking for advice. From _me_."

"Indeed."

Loki frowned at the thunder god.

"Why?"

"You are currently a woman."

"In case you have not noticed, _oh mighty God of Thunder_ , I am also currently..." She snapped her mouth shut.

Thor sighed.

"Loki, what do I have to do to truly convince you that I do not care about your true form?"

"How could you _not_ care, I'm hideous!"

"No, you are blue."

"Quit mocking me!"

"I am _not_! You are the only one who cares about being…what you are. I will always love you the same no matter if you are a man, a woman, a salmon or a horse! You are my sibling, and that is one of the things that will _never_ change with your form."

Loki's reaction was not what Thor had envisioned.

Instead of denying his words and teleporting away, as he'd expected, she did something that she had not done since they had both been small children: she threw herself at Thor and hid her face in his shoulder.

Thor shifted, careful of her swollen belly, and put his arms around her back.

He could feel the ice-cold of her tears even through his clothing.

* * *

Tony looked up from his tablet when Mjölnir landed on the couch next to him.

"Hey, Point Break, where have you been?"

"I asked Loki for advice."

"Sorry what."

"I required advice about a…womanly matter."

"Sorry what."

Thor looked at Tony like he was seriously questioning the inventor's intelligence. Tony felt like he had been teleported into some kind of role-reversal story.

"I required advice on how to select an appropriate present for my Lady Jane."

"And you asked _Loki_."

"Yes."

Tony disappeared behind his computer again.

"Okay, whatever floats your boat."

"I have a question."

Tony didn't look up. "Shoot."

"Have you noticed anything…different about Loki lately?"

"Nope. Still pregnant, still female, still freaking me out on a daily basis."

"I will pretend not to have heard that Anthony."

Now the billionaire looked up. Thor seemed strangely surprised to see his sibling.

"I was just telling him that I required your advice about acquiring a present for Jane."

"Ah. And you are telling me this because…"

"I thought you…might want to know."

"Okay, are you finished with you weird sibling-y interactions? Because I'm trying to work here."

Loki vanished in a flash of green light. Thor frowned, but ultimately seemed to shrug it of and absconded with Mjölnir to parts unknown.

Tony breathed a sigh of relief and went back to playing Minecraft.

* * *

Pepper was going to kill Tony. No, she was going to _eviscerate_ him.

"Tony, if you want to keep your crown jewels attached to the rest of you you will come here and sign this form _right this second_ , because deities help me I will…Loki!"

The goddess looked up, looking surprised to see her.

"Miss Potts."

"Hi, have you seen Tony?"

"No."

"Okay thanks."

Pepper was halfway out the door again when something…odd finally registered with her.

"You could ask Jarvis to rise the temperature you know."

Loki looked at her from where she was sitting swaddled in a mountain of blankets.

"I am not cold."

The CEO studied the other woman. Loki didn't _look_ cold. If anything the sorceress looked like she was sweating.

"Are you ill?"

"Why do you care?"

Pepper blinked, startled by the hostile reaction.

"Well, you are carrying Tony's baby. And you've given me no reason to dislike you. Well, besides making me fill out paperwork."

That seemed to mollify Loki somewhat.

"I am…alright."

Pepper frowned.

"No, you're not."

Loki glared at her over the top of her book.

"I think _I_ should have the final say about that."

"That's what _Tony_ would say. I can understand not wanting to be seen as weak, believe me, but it's not weak to need help some…"

Pepper took a step forward, her gaze still fixed on Loki's hand that was holding the book. Was her hand… _frozen_!?

"Loki, what happened to your hand!?"

The goddess looked from Pepper to her hand. Her already pale face went stark white. She hid her hand under one of her blankets.

"It is nothing."

Pepper stepped towards the sofa. "Loki, _that_ is not nothing." She carefully drew Loki's hand out from under the blanket by the goddess' sleeve, while Loki tried to become one with the furniture. "Come on, let me see."

When she finally got a good look at the sorceress' hand, Pepper felt like the sudden urge to punch someone. Maybe Loki.

Loki's hand was _blue_ , a deep indigo with strange raised lines that almost looked like scars, and almost completely encased by a layer of what looked like fine ice crystals. Pepper stared, before tearing her gaze away and looking up into the other woman's grief-stricken face.

"Have you been hiding this?" She inspected Loki's hand again, still wary about touching it. "It looks really bad. What is that?"

She was distracted from asking more questions by something small and cold hitting the back of her hand. Uncomprehendingly, Pepper watched a small ice crystal melt there.

When she looked up, Loki was crying, and her tears were leaving icy blue trails in their wake, freezing on her cheeks.

"Jarvis, lock the door."

There was a clicking sound and then Jarvis' cultured voice said "Done."

"Thank you. Now, Loki, _talk_."

The goddess drew a deep breath and fixated a point over Pepper's shoulder.

"Why should I trust you?"

"I don't know. Why shouldn't you?"

Loki sighed, and it sounded like the weight of the world was resting on her shoulders. Like centuries of sadness. Pepper carefully put the book to the side and took Loki's not-blue hand.

"It's the child. My magic is keeping it alive, and that is disrupting the glamour I wear."

Pepper frowned.

"Glamour?"

Loki sighed again. "Thor would insist that we are siblings regardless, but the truth is that we do not share blood. I am not related to him."

The CEO made a face, trying to figure out where this was going.

"I…don't understand…"

Loki still wasn't looking at Pepper, and her pale features were as flat and inexpressive as her voice when she said

"I am not an Asgardian. I am a…a Frost Giant. A Jotun. My Jotun heritage is what allows me to change my form and bear children."

That made sense, considering that Thor had never mentioned any other shape-shifting Asgardians as far as she knew. It would also explain…a lot of other things really.

Pepper studied the woman in front of her. She had never noticed on the few occasions she had seen Loki in the tower, but there was nothing of Thor in her facial features. Now that she knew, it was very obvious that they didn't have the same parents.

"So you're…"

"A stolen child, some would say."

And that already told her so much about how the subject of adoption had been handled in Loki's family.

"Okay, so you're adopted. That does _not_ explain why your hand is blue."

"In my birth form I have blue skin."

_Oh._

"Oh."

"If you let go of my hand I will show you."

"Let - go of your…"

Pepper looked down at their clasped hands.

"Touching Jotun skin will freeze your flesh. It does grave harm to an Asgardian, and you are only a mortal."

Pepper let go of Loki's hand.

As soon as she brought a little space between them, Loki's skin turned darker, almost like ink bleeding into white fabric, and in the blink of an eye the goddess was blue, her skin a deep indigo with raised marks like scars covering her face and neck. The irises and sclerae of her eyes had gone from emerald green to a dark red.

"Oh."

Loki smiled, but it looked forced.

"So now you know."

"Does Thor know?"

Pepper hadn't expected that to be the thing that made Loki finally look at her again, but it was.

"Of course he does."

"Then I don't understand why you're hiding it."

And Loki was staring at the wall again.

"Frost Giants are monsters and enemies of Asgard. No one wants to see one of them roaming around free."

_Well_ , Pepper found herself thinking _Loki has clearly been subjected to some A+ parenting._

"So you've been hiding it all your life?"

Loki made a derisive sound.

"I did not _know_ most of my life."

"They didn't tell you!?"

The goddess gave Pepper a strangely flat look.

"Would you tell your child that they're a monster?"

"I wouldn't teach my child to _believe_ that…never mind that now. So what you are saying is that you've been magically hiding your… _'birth form'_ and because of your magic keeping your child safe you can't do that anymore?"

Pepper had a feeling there were tons of backstory there that she wasn't getting, but at the moment that was the most pressing issue.

"Simply put, yes."

"Why don't you take the form of an Asgardian woman then?"

The sorceress dragged a hand through her raven hair. It left a sprinkling of ice crystals behind.

"I could. But I do not know…I am not certain that an Aesir woman could carry this child. When I…got pregnant my body changed on its own, so I have to assume that this child is dependent on my true form."

"Oh. Well, so that's a no-go then."

Loki put a protective hand over her belly. "It is not an option, no."

"Loki no one here will think that you're a monster. They're Avengers, they've seen stranger."

Before Loki could answer they were interrupted by Jarvis.

"Ladies, my creator is ever so kindly requesting your presence outside of the lounge."

That was definitely sarcasm, because a second later Jarvis put Tony on speaker.

_"Loki open the fucking door! We know you're pregnant and hormonal, but torturing Cap is not okay! This is not Avenger-approved behaviour! We had a deal on hurting people!"_

Pepper looked at Loki. Loki looked shocked, almost terrified, not guilty.

"Jarvis shut up Tony and put me through."

"With pleasure Miss Potts."

_"Ow, Jarvis, are you mad?!"_

"Tony?"

_"Pep? Are you in there with the insane witch?"_

"The _mother of your child_ , Tony, has been pleasantly chatting with me here for quite some time, not torturing anyone. And I'm sure she will help figure out what's wrong with Steve if you stop insulting her and _reasonably_ explain the situation, as will I."

She made a cut-throat motion with her hand and Jarvis obligingly muted the comm line.

"You didn't do anything did you."

Loki shook her head. "I do not know what ails the good captain."

"Alright. Can I have Jarvis open the door?"

A look of concentration passed the sorceress' face, and after a moment Loki looked human…Asgardian again. Some patches of skin on her neck and her hand were still blue though. Loki stared at her hand like she was about to burst into tears.

"Here, take this."

Pepper unwound her silk scarf from around her neck and draped it around Loki's bare shoulders so it was hiding the blue spots.

"Now you just have to hide your hand."

Loki didn't say 'thank you', but her eyes spoke volumes.

Pepper had Jarvis un-mute the comm.

"Okay Tony, you can come in if you promise to be a gentleman."

Seconds later Tony burst into the room, looking pale and frazzled. He took one look at Loki's face before saying

"Oh shit. It's not you is it."

"No. What ails your soldier?"

"He's, um, writhing in pain. Bruce and Natasha are with him, Clint is looking for intruders. He just…collapsed like BAM! and is all sorts of delirious."

"Sir." Jarvis voice came from the ceiling "Bruce informs me that Steve's state has worsened again."

Tony cursed violently. "Damn, he was getting better! Can you come right now, we're thinking magic because nothing else makes sense."

Loki got up from the sofa, hiding her hands in the folds of her skirt.

"Of course. Could he have been poisoned?"

Tony set a rapid pace towards the common room.

"We don't think so. It's really hard to poison him with his fast metabolism and enhanced immunity, and no one else has it even though we all ate the same things."

The rest of the way passed in hurried silence.

* * *

When they entered the common room, it was pandemonium.

Steve was writhing on the floor, screaming in pain and bathed in sweat, Clint, Natasha and Bruce holding him down. There was blood on his hands and on the floor next to his head. There were indents in the floor from where his flailing limbs had hit it, and a first-aid kit was lying off to the side, it's contents spilled all over the rug.

Bruce looked up briefly when they entered.

"Tony, thank god! Loki, make this stop!"

The sorceress knelt down next to the fallen supersoldier.

"This is not my doing, I assure you."

Loki turned to Pepper. Her face was grave but focused.

"Miss Potts please get my healing bag from my quarters. It is inside my travel chest. I will get Thor."

"Do you know what's wrong with him?"

"No. But if I do nothing it might not matter far too soon."

Pepper didn't ask anymore questions and started running towards the nearest lift, Jarvis' directions in her ear.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought some action couldn't hurt.


	9. Taking Pain And Jotun Script

… _Pepper didn't ask anymore questions and started running towards the nearest lift, Jarvis directions in her ear. …_

Pepper was kind of surprised that the door to Loki's room opened for her, but decided not to question her good fortune.

Sparing no more than a glance for the interior decoration -lots of green and some crimson- she immediately went over to the trunk at the foot of the bed, since it was the only thing in the room that looked like a 'travel chest'.

It occurred to her then that maybe she should have asked what a healing bag looked like.

Opening the trunk, the first thing she saw was what looked like and old but well cared for plaid in warm browns and oranges, which she put on the bed.

Pepper sent out a little prayer that the green pouch with the red S-shape on it that she spotted next was Loki's healing bag, because she grabbed that and ran back towards the common room.

* * *

When Pepper entered said common room, Thor was holding down a still thrashing Steve, while Loki seemed to be…chanting, with her hands held over Steve's face and her whole form bathed in a golden sheen.  
Everyone else was standing off to the side, looking like death warmed over. Pepper wasn't sure, but she could have sworn that Clint was crying, which was…worrying.

Shaking off that distracting thought she went over to where Loki was kneeling and put the bag next to the sorceress' leg.

Loki didn't even stop chanting, just grabbed the bag and drew what looked like a piece of wood out of it. Then she handed that piece to Thor, who apparently knew exactly what to do with it, because he shifted his grip on Steve so he had one of his hands free to crush the thing into powder over the soldier's face.

Steve made a sound like a dying animal and his whole body seized up, before his eyes fell shut and he went completely lax in Thor's grip.

Loki stopped chanting and the golden glow abruptly vanished.

The goddess sat back on her heels.

"He will survive."

Tony was the first one to break the shocked silence in the room.

"What do you mean 'he will survive', what did you do!? That didn't look like you were healing him."

Loki stood up slowly, brushing imaginary dust off her dress. She looked drawn, resigned.

"I wasn't. I did not heal him, I simply suppressed his ability to experience pain. I do not know what ails him, so I can do no more than take away the symptoms. The deep slumber he has fallen into is his body's way of conserving energy. Much like, I believe, what he experienced while asleep in the ice."

Bruce stepped towards Steve's prone form, but kept his eyes on Loki.

"Call me ungrateful, but how do we know that you've not intentionally made it worse?"

The sorceress made a tired sound in the back of her throat.

"I might punish people for imagined slights on occasion, but it would take grievous harm done to me to make me resort to torture. There is no reason for me to make him suffer so, and believe me, if I wanted him dead, he would be. I have done all I can to aid him, and I will search for a cure if you so wish. But if you do not trust me maybe you would rather not have me help…"

"Nonsense." Natasha looked determined. "We need all the help we can get. Bruce will have to get over it. So, could it be magic that made him like this?"

"I am 'over it'. I just thought someone should put the possibility out there that Loki…anyway, Natasha's question?"

Bruce made a vague 'answer it' hand motion.

Loki seemed to consider the question for a moment.

"It is likely. I felt no damage in his flesh when I healed him, and he has not, in all the time of our acquaintance, shown any sign of his spirit being corrupt. It might be a curse I have not yet encountered…do you know of anyone who might do this onto him?"

Everyone collectively shook their heads.

"All our magic-wielding foes except you are either off the radar or imprisoned. And none of them have ever done anything like this." Bruce frowned down at the felled supersoldier. "Speaking of 'like this', shouldn't we get Steve somewhere more comfortable?"

Thor put Steve on the sofa as gently as possible.

"So, Loki, you said you could 'search for a cure'? Well, please get to the searching then."

Loki looked surprised to have Clint ask her, but recovered quickly.

"I will. However, I will require various scrolls and tomes for my research, most of which are in either Vanaheim or Alfheim. Thor will have to get them for me, since I cannot presently travel to these realms."

Thor looked like he was about to disagree with that, but a look from Loki silenced him.

"Aye. I will fetch everything you require."

No more words were exchanged after that, as Loki went to get the research material she had brought with her and everyone else busied themselves with something, an oppressive air of inscrutable danger and worry hanging over them all.

* * *

The next two days were tense, a sense of doom hanging over the whole tower.

Steve, who by now was laying in the tower's infirmary, had not stirred from his 'deep slumber' even once. Bruce had gotten a " _really that kind of doctor_ ", who'd confirmed that the supersoldier was, for all intents and purposes, actually asleep and not in a coma.

That didn't help any with finding out what was wrong with him.

Loki spent all her time buried in books and ancient-looking scrolls Thor brought her at regular intervals, and would only be coaxed out of the room she had claimed as her study to eat and reluctantly go to sleep for a few hours. It was much the same thing with Tony and Bruce, except that they holed themselves up in a lab instead.

Pepper called in sick and took it upon herself to play nanny for them all, while Natasha and Clint went on a mission of 'questioning' the Avenger's _magic-wielding foes_. The CEO wasn't certain if it was a good or a bad thing that the whole saving-Steve-thing was effectively distracting Loki from turning blue on occasion. It seemed to be happening with increasing frequency, but considering that she was keeping three geniuses alive by force-feeding them, Pepper couldn't study that particular phenomenon too closely.

* * *

_[meanwhile in Asgard]_

It felt strange, returning to Asgard alone and without having been called by Odin. Thor nodded at Heimdall, but kept his stride brisk until he had reached the horse that was waiting for him.

He had called ahead for a reason after all, and that reason was saving as much time as possible.

Even though he had learned not to let such thoughts consume him, he would openly admit that he was worried. Loki had found no possible explanation of Steven's state in all the writings he had brought her from Alfheim, and had now sent him to the royal library of Asgard.

It did not, objectively speaking, take _long_ to reach first the palace and then the library, but it felt to him as if it did.

Once inside the humblingly large room filled to the brim with books and scrolls, Thor found himself at a loss. This time Loki had not specified what writings she required, but instead given him a certain subject she needed information on. A very strange subject, that had left Thor looking at Loki incredulously, but Thor had learned the hard way not to question his sibling's uncanny intuition for these things.

The Prince of Asgard was just about to look for the librarian, when a hand touched his shoulder.

"My son comes to visit and does not even feel the need to come and greet me?"

Thor turned around and felt a grin steal onto his face.

"Mother!"

Frigga laughed when he swept her off of her feet and hugged her.

"Thor, it has been too long."

He carefully put the Queen back on her feet.

"It has. But I am afraid this is not a visit for its own sake. I come bearing grave news."

Frigga's smile dimmed.

"What has happened? Is it Loki?"

The thunder god was quick to ease his mother's worries.

"No, no, Loki is well. It is my fellow Avenger Steven Rogers whom a grave illness has befallen. He was in horrid pain until Loki took it from him. She has sent me here to acquire writings on a certain subject for her."

His mother frowned at him.

"And what subject would that be? Most of the writings on healing are to be found in the royal library of Alfheim. And if it is knowledge about a spell or curse you seek, Vanaheim is the place too look for it."

Thor uncomfortably shifted from foot to foot. This was a subject he had hoped to avoid with his mother.

"Loki is seeking knowledge about Jotun physiology and magic. She told me that something she once read about Jötnar women has led her to belief that it might be relevant. She has not said it in so many words, but I inferred that she believes her own Jotun magic might be making the captain ill."

Frigga's expression was grave.

"The knowledge you seek is not here. But I am in possession of some very old scrolls that might help you. They are the only recordings about Jötnar form and magic that exist in the Asgardian and Vanir tongue. There are also some tanned hides inscribed in Jotun tongue that I believe contain similar information. But I cannot read them."

Thor looked at his mother in surprise.

"And you believe Loki might be able to?"

She smiled sadly.

"From what I know about the Jötnar, the knowledge of their mother tongue is something they are born with."

"I see. I have to admit that I am surprised that you choose to acquire such writings. I did not know that anything about the Frost Giants was a particular interest of yours."

Frigga gave her son a very stern look.

"The wellbeing of my children has always been a _particular interest_ of mine. Now come, I will give you the scrolls. If I am not mistaken, time is of the essence."

* * *

When Thor returned to the human realm he first checked on his ailing comrade, who's state had not changed, and then immediately went to find Loki.

"Loki?"

He looked inside what had effectively become Loki's study, to find her sitting slumped over a pile of books, one of them open in her hand. It looked like she had fallen asleep.

Thor was reluctant to wake her, but felt that the way her rounded stomach was pressed into the desk could not be healthy…or comfortable. He stepped forward and gently touched her shoulder, only to shout in surprise when the contact made a burning pain travel up his arm.

Letting go abruptly, Thor looked from his frozen palm to the deep blue spreading from where he had touched her on Loki's uncovered shoulder. That was the moment Pepper entered the room, carrying a tray of food.

She took one look at the scene and immediately set down the tray, hurrying over on clicking heels just as Loki stirred slightly.

"Oh no, she's blue again isn't she?"

Thor stared at her in discombobulated surprise.

"You know…"

"About her being a Frost Giant? Yes, she told me."

The thunder god felt like the ground under his feet was shifting precariously as he digested that information. He felt…unmoored, and couldn't quite decide if that was better or worse than what he had felt before.

He was brought out of his reverie by Loki saying

"Thor. Was that you shouting like a wild boar?"

"Yes, I…"

"Loki, you are turning blue again."

Loki looked at her shoulder and then at Thor's hand, and the look of shock and self-loathing that passed over her face was heartbreaking. Then she carefully straightened out her features, but she couldn't quite hide the pain in her eyes as she said

"Let me see."

The god obligingly held out his hand.

"I think it would be wiser to use a healing stone on this. My magic may not be very helpful in this case."

Thor frowned.

"You have always been able to heal me well before."

He immediately realised that this had been the wrong thing to say when Loki's face darkened considerably. Thor back-pedalled quickly.

"I will use a healing stone. Do not trouble yourself."

"Did you get the writings I asked you to acquire?"

"Yes. Mother gave me some scrolls and tomes that according to her contain all facts known to the Aesir and Vanir about…the subject you were interested in. And some tanned hides with inscriptions. She believes that you will be able to read them."

Pepper raised a brow.

"What subject _were_ you interested in Loki? Considering how vague Thor is being I'm guessing it has to do with…the Blue Thing?"

"That - is one way to put it, yes."

"I see. We'll, I'll leave you to it. There's food over there that I expect you to eat, not magic away, and you know where to find me should you need something. Or if you want to talk. Thor."

With that she squeezed past Thor and left the room.

"Why do I feel as if she has purposefully left us alone with each other?"

Loki sighed.

"Because she did. Now, the scrolls? No, on second thought, hand me the hides first."

Thor did. His sibling frowned at them and then looked up at Thor with a mystified expression.

"The Alltongue does not work on this."

"It is Jötnar script."nThe thunder god shifted from foot to foot, debating whether or not it was wise to repeat what Frigga had told him. Then he realised that he more or less already had. "Mother said that the Jötnar are born with the ability to read it. I believe she mentioned an _'intuitive language'_?"

Loki's expression turned to one of understanding, and she fixed her gaze to the strange signs again.

"A script tied to the magic of their kind. Like dwarven sigils."

"I have no idea what you are…"

"Yes Thor" she said absently "I am quite used to that."

Thor decided not to take offence. It was true after all.

"So you can read it."

She frowned. "No."

"No?"

"No as in 'I cannot read it'. Maybe mother was wrong, and it is bespelled to be unreadable. Very strange though, one would think she would notice. I can sense no such enchantment on it either."

"Loki maybe…you do not have the right eyes for it right now?"

It took a moment for her to figure out what he was implying, and Thor could have sworn that he _heard_ it when the dagger finally dropped. Then Loki looked at him somewhat hesitantly. He could feel the last of his already strained patience with the issue quickly running out.

"For the last time, I do not care what colour you have! You could be as pink as a Vanir meadow flower for all I care about it. Why do you always make everything needlessly difficult?"

His little speech seemed to have the desired effect, because a moment later he was facing a blue Loki.

"Try now."

Loki looked back down at the hide she was still holding. Her eyes widened in surprise, before she abruptly started making shooing motions with her hand, her blue state apparently forgotten in the face of discovery.

"I can read it now. Thank you. Go do…Thor things now please."

Thor chuckled, walking backwards out the door while watching Loki making distracted hand motions at thin air. There had to be _very_ interesting things on that hide, if she was engrossed enough to say "Thor things". And to forget that she was blue.

He just hoped it would aid Steven. The thought was sobering.

Feeling wary again, Thor made his way towards the laboratory Bruce and Tony were currently occupying. Maybe they would appreciate a set of strong hands to aid them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter kind of, um, jumped places… I hope the story flow will be better in the next one, in which we should also find out what's wrong with our beloved supersoldier. Thank you for reading.


	10. The Seer

Thor was becoming a bit worried. Since she had told him to go "do Thor things" he had checked on Loki twice, only to find her deeply engrossed in the material he had brought her both times.

What worried him was not that she had not touched the food Pepper had left for her, or that she was still blue. Forgetting everything while absorbing information was definitely Loki-behaviour.

No, what made him uneasy was the fact that his sister was seemingly oblivious to the fact that she was leaving a thin layer of ice crystals, on everything she touched, and that the room she was in was as cold as a cave in Niflheim. To be this inattentive was not like her at all.

Bracing himself for the cold, Thor entered the 'study' for the third time. Only to find it empty, and warm.

"Loki?"

There was no response. Thor addressed the ceiling.

"Jarvis, do you know where Loki has vanished too?"

"I am afraid not. She left the premises twelve minutes ago. Alone, sir."

Now Thor definitely _was_ worried. Even though many were wont to suggest differently, Loki usually honoured the agreements she made. That she had broken the rule not to leave the tower unsupervised was in no way reassuring.

Calling Mjölnir to his hand, Thor decided to search for her.

"Jarvis."

"Yes?"

"If I do not return within three hours please inform the others that I am looking for Loki and give them my location. I will take An…Tony's 'tracking device' with me."

"As you wish. Might I suggest…"

"No, you might not. This is something I have to do on my own."

"Very well sir. Please be careful. Your sibling tends to be…unpredictable."

"I will be. Thank you, Jarvis."

"Do not mention it."

* * *

_[meanwhile, in Jotunheim]_

Shielding her eyes against the harsh wind, Loki stared at the expanse of white and blue in front of her, trying to decide where to go next.

The map had not specified _where_ in the vast field of ice and snow the dwelling was to be found, and all she could see were _ice and snow_ , without end.

She had not made more then three steps when she all but ran into an invisible wall. A strangled sound escaped her throat as she landed in a drift of snow, having lost her footing completely.

Cursing, Loki melted the snow in a flash of magic and, after getting to her feet, tried to see what had blocked her path.

There was nothing to be _seen_ , but she felt the distinct _tug_ of strong magic. She frowned and concentrated, but even with some magic of her own she could not see the shield that had to be there.

She was just about to give up and try to shatter it sight unseen, when Thor's voice echoed in her head.

_"…maybe…you do not have the right eyes for it right now?"_

The sorceress warred with herself for a moment, before her curiosity inevitably won out. Fighting against her instinctive resistance, she let go of the tattered remains of her glamour.

As soon as her birth form had taken hold, a dome of shimmering green light became visible in front of her. She cautiously put her hand to the shield.

Just to fall through it completely. She just so managed to catch herself, falling onto her side instead of onto her belly, and just lay there in stunned surprise for a moment.

_Well, that was certainly unexpected._

She just so had time to finish that thought before the ground broke open under her.

The next thing she knew, she was falling.

* * *

The first thing Loki felt on waking up was fur, covering the whole of her body.  
…Her very _naked_ body and how in the name of Yggdrasil had that come about?

But her first concern was certainly not modesty. She had woken up magic bound or stolen enough times to know that this was not the case now.  
Trailing a hand over her round stomach, relief flooded her when she felt a strong current of magic push back against her own spell. Now that she knew her child was well, the goddess looked around, trying to make sense of what had happened after the ice had split open under her.

She was naked, and blue, but aside from that there was nothing immediately threatening about the situation. She was sitting in what looked like a natural hollow in the ice, a very small cave barely large enough to hold two people of her own size. The furs she was sitting on, as well as the one someone had covered her with were grey-brown, and looked like they belonged to one of the large spider-like creatures she had seen from afar during her travel to the sacred field of the Jötnar.

The only other sign of civilisation was a small stone bowl filled with glowing coals that gave off a pleasant warmth, and a cup made of silver. Loki could sense no enchantment on the cup when she picked it up, and no magic but her own was lingering in the air.

It was only after a moment of contemplation that she noticed what felt _off_ about her surroundings.

The cave had no entrance, and no crack in the ceiling that she could have fallen through. She was encased in ice from all sides.

Loki's first reaction to that realization was to stand up abruptly from where she had been kneeling, and gather her magic in a defensive spell around herself.

Her fight-or-flight impulse was a logical reaction to being trapped, but oddly enough the emotions one expected to accompany it were completely absent. She wasn't worried or frightened at all. If anything she felt… _safe_.

Before her mind could quite catch up with her body, she had dropped her shielding spell and sat down on the furs again, wrapping one of them around her shoulders.

It was… _strange_. She was somewhat accustomed to her body and mind telling her different things, but usually the two weren't quite this…dissonant.  
Her mind -very logically- insisted that she should be worried, alarmed and on guard, imprisoned by some unknown being (beings?) and surrounded by ice, but her body's impulses were more along the lines of laying down and going to sleep. She felt oddly comfortable, even though she was trapped in enemy territory.

The mind boggled. Quite literally.

The sorceress was brought out of contemplating this oddity by a sound like ice splitting.

In the blink of an eye, a Jötnar woman a good head taller than Loki entered the cave, literally stepping _through_ the ice. Loki stared.

Later she would wonder how it had not even occurred to her to gather her magic to defend herself, but in that moment the trickster found scooting over to make room for the woman perfectly logical.

"Ah, you're awake." The Jotun crouched down in front of Loki, looking her over.

"You look much better without that useless fabric covering you. Healthier, too. It isn't good to trap your skin."

The Jotun, Loki noted somewhat detachedly, was wearing nothing but a short wide leather skirt. But it was unpleasantly warm this close to her, so Loki leaned back until she felt the ice of the cave wall at her shoulder. The Jötnar woman nodded, looking pleased with herself.

"Ah, some of your true nature coming through, that's good. You may call me Aggys, and I gather _your_ name is Loki."

That returned Loki's wits to her, and she straightened up instinctively, drawing her seidr into her hands and feet and over her belly. She didn't know how the Jotun knew her name, but it wasn't a good sign.

The Jötnar woman tutted.

"Hush, none of that nonsense now. You don't want to hurt your young, do you?"

Loki felt herself tense. If the beast was implying she would try and hurt her child…

"Ah, now, always so defensive. All I am saying is that Aesir magic will do the child no good. I mean look at what it did to _you_ , two heads to short and a stranger in your own skin." The woman gestured towards Loki. "Not to mention you look horribly underfed, what have you been eating? Plants?"

"Who are you, and why have you trapped me here?"

"I told you, I am Aggys. And you're hardly trapped. If you find it so dire here why have you not world-walked away?"

Loki opened her mouth to say something scathing, then faltered. The woman was right. There was no reason for her not to spirit herself away. She could feel no spell keeping her there, and ice had certainly never stopped her before. There was no logical explanation not to just…escape.

The thing was, she didn't _feel_ trapped. Or in danger.

Aggys seemed well aware of the sorceress' confusion, and her voice was oddly gentle when she spoke again.

"Not trapped, see? Now, why don't you hand me one of those furs and we'll talk."

Loki took the fur she was wearing over her shoulders and handed it over. Aggys sat down on it.

"So, Loki. You came here to see me, all the way from Midgard."

Something clicked in Loki's mind, and she felt her eyes widen.

"You are the seer!"

Aggys' red eyes were twinkling with mirth.

"That I am."

"But you are…" Loki caught herself. It wouldn't do to anger the seer by implying that she was a beast.

Aggys smiled, showing a set of small fangs.

"A Jotun? Yes, but so are you Your Highness."

Loki bristled. "There is no need to call me that."

"No? But you are of a high standing, Fárbauti-daughter."

Huffing in disgust, Loki turned to stare at the cave wall. The ice couldn't be too thick, considering that there was light to see by inside the cave.

"You mean Laufeyson."

"I see no son of Laufey's. But I do see the daughter of Fárbauti, sharing the _ralr_ of her mother and heavy with child. Asgard has changed you, but those are right that say true beauty can never be hidden for too long."

Aggys took the cup and scooped some loose ice into it, then put it over the coals in the bowl.

"You have come seeking answers, carrier of Lævateinn, holder of the casket, but to be answered one has to ask questions."

Loki frowned at 'holder of the casket', but decided it could wait.

"Can you tell me if the child in me will survive?"

"I can."

The goddess narrowed her eyes at the Jotun.

"Will you?"

The seer laughed. "You're a smart one. Yes, your child will survive pregnancy and birth. Healthily, even. But life, that is another story. No one survives life. We all die."

Loki felt herself getting annoyed.

"That is cryptic, and vague."

Aggys smiled again. "As is the nature of these things."

Then she sighed. "I cannot say more. I promised not to, long ago. But if you stay, and promise not to run from change, I can help you. Carrying this child has been hard on you, I can tell. I can make it easier, if you trust me."

It was true. Loki remembered the back pains and the feverish misery not that long ago that she had hidden from everyone, and the constant feeling of her skin being too small. She hadn't slept deeply in a month, either.

As foolish as it was to show weakness, she allowed herself to close her eyes for a moment. Something about the cave -cramped as it was, filled with two people now- was oddly calming. It made the outside world feel far away, like an eternity had passed since she had world-stepped out of Midgard. And she was so, so tired.

Forcing her eyes open again, Loki looked Aggys in the eye.

"I will stay. But if you try to harm me, I will kill you." That she would make the Jotun _long_ for death should she hurt her child stayed unspoken.

Aggys nodded. "I have no doubt." She took the cup out of the bowl of coals and handed it to Loki. The ice had, predictably, turned to water.

"Drink that, we can't have you drying out."

The goddess cautiously took a sip of the warm water, and felt her brows raise in surprise. Unlike the water on Midgard, it wasn't bitter. The seer studied her intently.

"Oh my dear child. We have a lot of work to do."

Loki felt that that sounded ominous. But she honestly could think of no way to bow out gracefully _now_ , so she resigned herself to her fate and tried not to look too scared.

Frigga was right. Her curiosity would be the death of her eventually.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I tried to make no one sigh this chapter, _honestly_. Err, anyway, turns out we _didn't_ find out what's wrong with Steve, whoops. I'm sorry. But Loki's about to get a break from quarrelling with her fate, which I have definitely been looking forward to. As MissMelysse so poignantly put it: _10k words of moping gets boring. Fast._
> 
> Have a good day, wherever you are reading this from.


	11. Transformation, Part One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve gets better, sort of. Tony is Tony.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can only thank all the people who have commented, subscribed to this story, or otherwise shown their interest. It makes me immensely happy, and gives me motivation for the "rough patches" of writing this story. You are fantastic people.

_[Earth]_

Tony stumbled in to the kitchen, making a bee-line for the coffeemaker. After his Manna had started brewing, he turned to the blonde wolfing down what looked like a kiloton of eggs at the table.

"Morning Thor. Say have you seen…" The blonde looked up. "Holy shit, Steve!"

"Mrnng Tony." Steve swallowed and tried again. "Morning Tony."

Tony stared. Then his brain caught up and he bolted out of the kitchen.

"Bruce! Bruce! Steve is awake!"

"What?"

The inventor screeched to a halt next to where Bruce was doing crosswords on the sofa.

"Steve is sitting in the kitchen emptying the pantry."

Bruce shot up. "What!?"

"Steve - is - sitting…"

"I heard you. What are you waiting for, let's get there!"

They ran back to the kitchen, where Steve was still eating. He had moved on to cornflakes now.

"Steve!"

"Morning Bruce. Do you want some?" Steve held up his bowl.

"Steve, how are you awake?"

Steve frowned. "I shouldn't be? It's eight. Also I ate all the eggs, sorry."

Bruce stepped next to Steve, critically looking him over.

"What do you remember. From before waking up, I mean?"

The supersoldier blinked. "I was asleep? Um, I mean that's…logical…right?"

Tony nodded.

"Totally, but he meant before that."

"Uh, I probably got wasted on Asgardian drinks again? Sorry, but I kind of have a small blackout. I just remember, err…passing out. Then I woke up in the infirmary, but I feel fine and I was hungry, so I figured it was no big deal. I was going to call you next thing."

Steve held up his mobile as if to demonstrate.

Bruce frowned harder. "Steve, that is not what happened. Are you in pain?"

"Err, no? I ate a bit too fast and my stomach is complaining a bit but otherwise…I feel pretty swell, actually. I could use more orange juice though."

Tony wordlessly passed the bottle.

"So," Steve said between bites of cornflakes and milk "what _did_ happen?"

"You had, like, serious bad magic mojo going on. You were in a hell of a lot of pain. We needed Thor to hold you down. Then Loki did her thing and you passed out. That's it."

Bruce had just opened his mouth to no doubt supply a more detailed explanation when Steve said

"Who's Loki?"

Bruce shut his mouth and blinked at Steve. Tony stared.

"Uh…pale black-haired green-eyed magic lady? Sometimes a guy? Presently pregnant with Tony-junior?"

And wow, he had gotten that out without having a nervous breakdown, Pepper would be so proud.

Steve frowned disapprovingly at the last part, but no recognition lit up his face.

"I have no idea who you are talking about. And if she's pregnant you should marry her."

Tony choose to ignore Steve's spontaneous reversal into Captain Oldfashioned for the moment.

"But you remember me. And Bruce. You remember Natasha?"

Steve nodded.

"Clint, Thor?"

"Yes, _Tony_ , I remember the team just fine."

Tony turned to Bruce.

"Could the weirdly specific memory loss have something to do with the magic stuff?"

Bruce shrugged. "I have no idea, but let's find Thor and ask him."

"You mean find Loki."

"No, I mean find Thor. They're both not in the tower so we should use Thor's tracking device. Loki probably dragged him off to a bookstore again."

"And how do you know that they're not here?"

Tony received a vaguely pitying look from Bruce at this question.

"I have been up since six, and there is no way that Thor and his godly sense of smell would miss the toasting of Pop Tarts."

"Oookay, fair point. Alright, let's go to the lab and track down Big And Thunderous. Stevie, stay here and don't fall over again."

Steve had apparently stopped paying attention at some point, and was presently decimating a year's supply of buttered toast and fruit. Tony shot him a mock-wounded look.

"I can see how it is. I'm worth less attention than roasted bread."

Steve looked up in alarm. "No, 'm jus ungry."

Bruce rolled his eyes. "Tony is kidding. Come on Wounded Heart, we have a god to find."

"Hey, I'm the only one allowed to give out nicknames here!"

Bruce just dragged the inventor out of the kitchen by his sleeve.

* * *

_[Midgard, elsewhere]_

Thor was not as prone to cursing his sibling as he once might have been, but by now he was ready to throw quite vile things at Loki, word-wise.

She had world-walked. Without him. To _Jotunheim_.

And left a note, but he wasn't sure if that made it better or worse, so he was ignoring that fact for now.

He pulled his mobile out of his pocket. It had taken some time to master the intricacies of its operation, not to mention the small keys, but by now he was quite adept at it. It was probably best not to assemble the Avengers quite yet. Thor had a feeling that he knew why Loki had ventured to the Ice Realm.

He texted Tony, telling him that he was going to take Loki to Vanaheim to consult with a healer about Steve's dire state.  
It was a lie, but the thunder god wasn't sure that the truth would not be very damaging just then.

Once his message was sent, Thor gripped Mjölnir tightly, and flew to top of the nearest building.

Then he called for the Gatekeeper of Asgard.

* * *

_[Jotunheim, earlier]_

Loki was cold, stiff, and wholly miserable.

Cursing whatever insanity had previously taken hold of her mind, she shifted around in the snow, trying to find a marginally less uncomfortable position.

She was sitting in a drift of snow, stark naked and holding an icicle, of all things.  
This could _not_ be healthy for the child, no matter what Aggys said. It certainly didn't _feel_ healthy to the mother.

Sighing, she tried to make the ice _'do things'_ for the umpteenth time. Do things. What a cryptic and utterly useless description. But that was the task she had been given. To make the ice do things.

Huffing in frustration, she resisted the urge to throw the damned icicle.

_Now, let's be reasonable. All that would accomplish is you having to search for it._

Trying to block out the cold, the stiffness of her limbs and her growling stomach -she was _always_ hungry theses days-, Loki focused her whole attention on the piece of ice in her hands.

_Will you just do something. Melt, crack, turn into pink slippers, I could not care less._

The ice remained frustratingly unresponsive. It reminded her of trying to light a candle with her mind in her youth. _That_ she had mastered in hours. Fire had always been her strongest element, and wasn't that ironic.

She felt like she had been sitting in the snow for days, even though the low light told here it had been a few hours at most. If it wasn't so miserably cold, maybe she would feel less like she was being punished for some unknown transgression.

Aggys choose that moment to appear next to the sorceress, holding a large fur and what looked like a wide shift.

"Not making progress I see."

Loki glared at the Frost Giant.

"Now, don't fret. You might be used to magic coming to you easily, but this is your natural Jotun magic. You've suppressed it all your life, it is no wonder that it is hard to access now."

It was strange, how much that consoling tone was reminiscent of Frigga's gentle admonishments, whenever she thought her children were too impatient, or just being silly.

"Here. These are enchanted, they will make you feel warm."

Loki took the shift and pulled it over her head, feeling the magical warmth of a spell wash over her. Settling the fur over her shoulders, she sighed.

"I would have thought the Jötnar immune to the cold."

Aggys smiled. "We are. You are not truly cold, child. It's the Aesir seidr playing tricks on you. It is impressive that you can use magic so far from your own at all, but at the moment it is more of a hindrance than a help. Jötnar seidr is strong, but that of the Aesir is far more _forceful_. It will take time for the former to break through. Come, let us get out of the snow, there is a storm coming."

The goddess took the seer's hand, and the ice split open under them.

* * *

A moment later, they were standing insode the larger ice cave that was Aggys' actual home, as opposed to the small hollow were Loki had first woken. A fire was burning in a rough stone fireplace, with a deep bowl full of some broth set over it on a tripod. Loki put the icicle on the floor, far away from the flames.

"Maybe I might make _some_ progress this century if you specified _how_ , exactly, I am supposed to make the ice ' _do things_ '."

Aggys shook her head.

"But that is the point of it, not knowing what to do. It has to come naturally, or it won't work at all. Just give it time, Loki. I know that you can be very patient if you want to be."

Loki snorted. "I know at least five people who would disagree with that statement."

"Ah, but you waited centuries for that Midgardian, did you not?"

The goddess' head snapped up.

"How do you know that?"

The Jotun smiled. "I am a seer, dear, we know these things. One should think being raised as the daughter of Frigga would have taught you that."

Loki mumbled something along the lines of that this didn't mean she had to appreciate it, before helping herself to some broth, talking a stone bowl and a spoon from a shelf hewn into the ice.

As soon as she'd taken a first spoonful into her mouth, she almost spit it out again. Swallowing with some difficulty, she looked at Aggys.

"Are you tying to poison me?"

"You don't like it?"

"Like it? This is vile. What in Yggdrasil's name _is_ that?"

"Vegetable soup."

Loki blinked, then looked into her bowl. It _did_ have the appearance of a broth made of greens, but the taste certainly didn't match it.

"Did you make it with rotten vegetables, or do all Jotunheim greens taste like this."

"These are Asgardian greens."

Loki opened her mouth to state that these were most certainly _not_ …when she caught a piece of purple root with her spoon.

_Gallad root?_

Peering into the large bowl over the fire, she spied something floating in the broth tat she definitely recognised. A mushroom, which was -quite fittingly- called 'Asgardian dumpling'. There was no way for her to miss it, considering Thor made somewhat of a sport of wolfing down about a ton of them every Harvest Festival. Fishing it out with her spoon, she stared at it in consternation.

"No one is that bad of a cook."

Aggys chuckled. "No."

"Than why does this taste like something died in it?"

"Because nothing did."

"I - beg - your - pardon?"

Loki was not used to blinking at people in incomprehension, but really, what did one say to _that_.

Aggys seemed far to amused by this situation.

"You may have been eating plants all your life, but we are a race of carnivores, for the most part. It's no wonder that you're underfed. I would get used to it if I were you, in your true form most plants are going to taste horrible. Or like nothing much, for that matter."

Well, that explained a lot of things, really.

"This would explain why I thought Thor was trying to poison me with those apples."

"No, that was due to what the Midgardians call 'plant protection'. I have no idea how putting poison on produce is supposed to protect anything, but apparently they're quite fond of it."

Loki studied the woman in front of her intently, absently putting her bowl away.

"You seem to know quite a lot about Midgard, and Asgard, for someone unable to travel there."

Aggys raised one rigged brow.

"Who says that I cannot travel there?"

Anything that Loki might have said to that was taken out of her head by a sharp stabbing pain flaring up along her back, like a white-hot dagger being thrust into her lower spine.

* * *

She didn't register falling, only the jarring shock of hitting the icy floor, more pain blossoming along her back and spreading along her sides.

Her vision was clouded, strange patterns dancing in front of her eyes, but she still registered Aggys kneeling down next to her and taking her hand, though she didn't feel the later through the pain now ravaging her whole body.

"What - did you - _do_ to me!?"

Her voice sounded wrong and far away, a strange wailing filling her ears.

"I did nothing. The pain will pass, soon. Just keep breathing."

Loki wondered how she was supposed to breathe with her lungs full of fire.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, cliff-hanger. Don't worry, the next chapter is almost done already. And yes, Steve. I know. We'll get to it, soon.


	12. Transformation, Part Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I-left-you-with-that-cliff-hanger-forever-I'm-so-sorry. Let's get on with the story…

_Ice._ _Cold wind and frozen water, the lands of her ancestors stretching out under her naked blue feet. Snow. Great spider-beasts on the hunt, their fur gleaming in the diffuse sunlight._

_The walls of the Temple high around her, and the surface of the Casket cold under her hands. The chill of the ice crown in her hair._

_Something missing, a hollowness under her heart where the pulse of her child had beat. And her heart calling for blood, lips whispering words into the Casket's ancient core. A promise._

' _You will give away your son, Laufey. And with that you will give away your life and your throne.'_

_The sound of feet and armed guards drawing near. Touching her hand to the casket one last time._

' _Protect my child, casket. Remember my daughter.'_

* * *

Loki had woken up screaming enough times to have mastered two things.

Getting her voice under control quickly and assessing if screaming was actually warranted.  
In this case, the answer was no.

She was too warm, and laying in an uncomfortable position on a cold floor, but not actually in pain or any _major_ discomfort.

Snapping her mouth shut, she opened her eyes…  
…to see an icicle's sharp tip a hair's breadth from her face.

Exhaling, she carefully turned her head, surveying her surroundings.

There was ice. A lot of ice, sharp edges and jagged ends of broken ice-pieces everywhere, all around here. She could barely move enough to put a hand to her belly. Which thankfully had _not_ been pierced by an icicle.

Her child was fine. That was good.

But she was also surrounded by a cage of blade-like icicles, preventing her from moving more than her arms and her head. And apparently her magic had abandoned her. Splendid. She pushed down the panic welling up in her chest and tried to think. Her mind came up with nothing useful.

Having spent quite a lot of time in Anthony Stark's presence recently, Loki felt reasonably certain that the appropriate Midgardian expression for this was ' _fuck_ '.

Where was the damn seer when you needed her?

* * *

_[Jotunheim, nearby]_

"Loki!"

The only answer he got was the rushing sound of ice-cold wind. Thor put his cupped hands to his mouth.

"LOKI!"

Unsurprisingly, his call stayed unanswered.

The _Ragar_ was an unwelcoming place, barren except for a few formations the wind had carved out of an ancient glacier, cold and white-blue and devoid of life.

Thor pulled his fur-coat tighter around himself and cursed his sibling for the umpteenth time.

_Loki, where are you?_

"Thor."

Raising Mjölnir, Thor whirled around. No one was behind him.

Shaking his head, he pressed a hand to his chest where the protection amulet was hidden under his clothes. Long years of training (and Loki's furious admonishments) had taught him better than to take it out and touch it where he could be observed, but it's shape against his skin still made him feel markedly saver.

The old tales said that the _Ragar's_ magic did strange things to your mind. Thor was beginning to believe them.

Adjusting his grip on his hammer, he trudged on towards the spot the enchanted parchment in his hand indicated.

The last place Heimdall had seen Loki, before she had disappeared.

* * *

He had walked for what might have been a Midgardian hour when he ran into the invisible wall.

And fell on his behind in a rather undignified manner.

Well. Clearly there was magic at work here.

He could feel the wall, but his eyes saw nothing, not even a line in the snow or snowflakes hitting an invisible barrier.

The thunder god spent some time hitting the unseen obstacle with Mjölnir, before a niggling voice in the back of his head informed him that this might not be the wisest course of action. A voice that sounded rather like Loki.

Sighing in defeat and exhaustion, Thor sank down onto the snow, leaning his back against the magic barrier.

"I simply wish to retrieve my sister. Is that too much to ask?"

He thought he heard someone say "No.", but before he could even turn his head to look for the speaker, the ground swallowed him.

When recounting this occurrence to his comrades later, Thor would pretend that he had shouted in alarm like a warrior, but he really did not shout in a _manly_ manner.

His squeak would have made an Asgardian field mouse proud.

* * *

When he could tell his hands from his feet again, the crown prince of Asgard found himself laying on top of a sizeable pile of snow and ice, inside what appeared to be a fissure in the frozen ground of the _Ragar_ , the light of Jotunheim's un-warming sun shining down on him from above.

Before him, the fissure widened, turning into the entrance of what appeared to be a cave inside the ice.  
He would have tried to leave the fissure immediately, if not for something silver catching his eye.

There was a cup laying on the cave floor, made of silver and covered in strange markings. And there was a small stone bowl full of coals. When he touched them, they were still warm.

Had Loki hidden here, in this cave inside the ice? Sought shelter from the harsh wind, or the spider-like beasts he had seen in the distance?

Frowning, Thor looked around the small cave, searching for any sign of his sister, or her magic.

Nothing but ice, the cup and the small fire pit.

He was just about to give up and return to the surface, when he looked at one of the cave walls, noticing something strange.

There were small cracks in the ice, and it looked almost like someone had broken it open with a tool and then melted it so it froze back together. Very odd.

Knocking against the ice, it sounded hollow. Thor grinned.

_Found you._

* * *

Breaking the wall down with Mjölnir was a minimal effort, and when the icy dust cleared, Thor was looking inside a larger second cave.

Full of icicles. He stared, dropping his hammer next to himself.

The cave was filled to the brim with sharp, jagged pieces of ice, some small as daggers and some longer than broadswords, glittering in the muted light. When he touched one, the blade-like edge nearly drew blood.

Squinting, the thunder god tried to make out anything that might have hidden _behind_ this chaotic assortment of ice pieces. For a moment, he thought that he saw a flash of blue.

Picking up his weapon, Thor braked himself before calling out.

"I can see you. Show yourself!"

There was a tense moment of silence where he stood waiting for an attack, before an incredulous but incredibly familiar voice said

" _Thor?_ "

from behind the ice.

"Loki?"

"Thor! What in all the Realms are you _doing_ here?"

Still wary –it might be an illusion he was talking to after all- Thor broke down a few of the icicles and moved further into the second cave.

"I was looking for you and now I have found you. But should not I be the one to ask _you_ what you are doing?"

"I do not owe you any explanations!"

If this was an illusion, it was a very good one. Thor sighed.

"Loki, you broke your agreement with the Avengers. You world-walked. Without me. To _Jotunheim_."

There was a long awkward pause.

"Thor, could we have this argument after we have returned to Midgard? I promise not to complain overmuch should you shout at me."

The thunder god frowned in suspicion. That did _not_ sound like Loki. At all.

"Are you real?"

"…Are you serious?"

Thor tapped his foot in irritation.

"The _Ragar_ 's magic has played tricks on me before. Illusions can easily mimic voices, but they seldom possess the knowledge of those they are imitating."

Loki's voice was full of mocking exasperation.

"I am aware Thor, I taught you that."

"You did."

"…And?"

"Tell me something only Loki would know."

"I _am_ … _(sigh)_ never mind. Well, let us see…you like Asgardian dumplings."

"Many people know of that, since many people come to the Harvest feast every…"

"All right, all right, let me think! Err…as a child you tried to wield an iron pan like a shield and broke your own foot."

"Someone might have told you that, it's a well-known story."

"Thor for Valhalla's sake!"

"I am sorry, but I have to be certain."

It looked like the blue thing shifted behind the ice before Loki's voice said

"You're afraid of the dark."

Thor felt his face split into a grin.

"It is you."

"Yes, you buffoon, now do me a favour and make yourself useful by breaking down these ice pieces."

Thor lifted Mjölnir and got to work.

* * *

It took an astonishingly long time before Thor had broken most of the ice.

He was just about to smash large horizontal icicle when Loki said

"Careful now. I'm lying under that."

Thor blinked. Then he –very gently- tapped his hammer against the icicle, catching it with a hand wrapped in his cape when it fell off.  
Then he blinked again. There was Loki, laying flat on her back, in her blue Jötnar form and clothed only in a thin, ill-fitting shift.

"You are…"

"Blue?"

"I was going to say 'dressed rather light for this weather'."

Loki shot him a sour look.

"Hilarious. These are Aggys' clothes."

Thor raised a brow.

"Aggys?"

"The...I will tell you later. Would you mind if we left this uncomfortable setting?"

"You _will_ explain it. All of it."

His sister nodded somewhat wanly. Thor frowned, noticing her strained features for the first time.

"Loki, are you injured?" Then something else occurred to him. "Why didn't you melt the ice?"

When Loki looked up at him, there was a terrible expression on her face, like someone had hollowed out her eyes and filled them with dull red stones.

"My magic. It's gone."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I gave you another cliff-hanger. Err…sorry?
> 
> Anyway, just so you know, the second half of this chapter is un-betad since my beta reader left for a short trip and I wanted to finish this in her absence. I did my best with proofreading though. Please leave a review and let me know what you think!


	13. Story Status? Please read the A/N

**Please read:**

_**At the moment, the future of this story is uncertain.** _

I can honestly not tell you if it is on hiatus, discontinued, or just in limbo awaiting a partial re-write.

Yes, I realise that this sucks. It really bloody sucks, especially since I left you with a cliffhanger. (After this and my on-hiatus X-Men story, I should have learned my lesson about writing cliffhangers without having the next chapter completed…)

I can only say that I'm sorry. But the current state of affairs is this:

 **A) This fic got f*cked up by my computer twice.** The first time I lost three and a half already written, not backed-up chapters _while making a backup_. The second time I lost two chapters plus my _whole outline_ and all my timeline and research work. After that I had admittedly lost my enthusiasm.

 **B) This was originally meant to be a silly, largely plot-less story** with one main story arc and domestic!Avengers shenanigans. Then I fleshed it out a bit. Which was fine, I didn't mind having a more 'serious' story. But **then I went and added a plot, which I still regret deeply.** If I every rewrite this story, I will likely remove at least one of the subplots I started and cut out quite a bit of "plotty" material.

 **C)** Even though it might not actually be visible in the 'end-product', **my writing style and process have changed a lot since I started writing this story.** Which is another thing that makes me dislike writing for it.

 **D)** Long story short, **I just don't "feel" this story anymore and have no idea what I'll end up doing with it.**

 **That means** **no updates in the foreseeable future** **. I can only apologise for that.**

I'm not trying to make you feel sorry for me, just to illustrate my frustration with this story. Fact is, I write, first and foremost, for fun (and occasionally, catharsis). And writing for this fic has become anything but.

Also, trying to make myself re-write this fic resulted in an almost complete outline and quite a lot of material for another story and, in terms of "writing enjoyment", the new story wins.

Apologising one more time isn't going to make this better but, hey, I'll do it anyway.

Read long and prosper  
-LF


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